The Illusion of Permanence

Chapter 6

"Run away with me."

We are sitting on the cotton-candy blue swings in the town's only playground, which was behind the central school. The rusty chains squeak a bit as we sway back and forth, moving the swings by rocking on our toes. Luna had said this statement casually, in between sips of the strawberry smoothie she had gotten at the diner before we left.

I quickly swallow the mouthful of peach mango smoothie, which she had paid for after I complained about not having any extra money to spend. "What?"

"Yeah. Come on, it'll be fun. I mean, you already left your home, so you can go anywhere in the world—why do you have to stay here? I need to leave this town just as badly as you needed to run away from yours. Come on, let's go. Please?"

I look at her, suddenly intimidated by her big eyes. I feel like I am falling into them, and I'm not sure if that is necessarily a good thing. I'm getting lost in them, and losing myself in them. I need to hold my ground, so that's where I look; hoping breaking the eye contact will help me say what I need to.

"I like it here," I say, trying really hard not to mumble. I'd picked this place specifically—as specifically as random can get, anyway—and I had it in my mind to stay. It was the type of place I'd always dreamed of living: a small town, hidden away in the middle of nowhere from the rest of the world, slow and peaceful and tranquil, surrounded by nature and nothingness.

"But I like you," Luna says softly.

I look back up at her. I am drowning in her chocolate eyes. I like her, too.

"You're the first new thing that's been here in... ages. And you're the first new thing to happen to me, and meeting you just makes me want to experience more new things and... I don't know. I want to know you. I want to get out of here and I want you to come with me. Please? You have the experience of running away, too, so like... I don't know. You have the knowledge and the guts. I need to get out of here. I'm so stuck. I need to experience and explore. I need something more. I don't... I don't know if..." She took a deep, jagged breath. "If I stay here, I don't know if I can survive. I can't really explain, but, just, please? Please come with me."

I swirl my toe around in the sand underneath us, making uneven circle patterns. "Where do you want to go?" I ask with a sigh. I can't believe I'm actually considering this, but she had a point about wanting to experience things together. I wanted to get to know her too, and I could totally picture us together, going on adventures and discovering each other at the same time that we discovered the world. We could get to know each other here, sitting on rusty swings or in mosquito flooded fields, talking in conversations that would be as circular as the patterns I was making in the sand. Or we could get to know each other out there—wherever out there was—by doing and observing each other. They say the best way to learn a language is by living in a country that speaks it. I feel like the same could be said for learning people: the best way to understand someone is to experience them. And I want to experience Luna just like she wants to experience the world.

"My brother lives in the city," she says, as if she's thought about this plan before. I know she means New York City, because it is the closest metropolis to us even though it is about two and a half hours away from this town. To everyone in New York State, New York City is just "the city". "My second-oldest brother. He's in college and he does like, nothing probably because he's never done anything productive with his life, so like I bet he probably won't mind at all if we go and crash with him for a little while."

"A little while?" I'm getting confused by her plan.

"Yeah. I mean, I want to get out there, but I want to come back too, of course. My senior year is coming up, and then college, but like, for the summer I want to do something crazy. And then we can come back in time for September and I can go to school and you can work for my brother and it'll go back to how you planned. But first, let's have an adventure. We're only going to be sixteen once, ya know?"