ethereal [joe jonas]

chapter thirteen

i decide to keep my distance from joe the rest of the day. 

it sucks because it's my birthday but i can't bring myself to be near him because i just feel confused and stressed when i am. we're in idaho, and the boys aren't performing today, so everyone is free the whole day. my dad takes me out for a special breakfast early in the morning at a cafe which has a beautiful view of one of idaho's landmarks. by the time we get back at 10 o'clock, everyone's already awake, and the first thing joe does when he sees me is give me a friendly hug and a card. 

"i couldn't get you anything but i made this for you" he smiles sheepishly, his hazel eyes staring right into my blue ones. my heart skips a beat when he stares into my eyes; and i grin back at him despite my own promise to keep my distance. "i love this, you don't need to get me anything" i tell him, taking the card from him. we make our way back to our shared room. "read it" he prompts, and i take the card out of the envelope. it's a store bought card, with an ombre design on the front and "happy birthday!" in gold lettering across the front. wow, joe really knows my style, i think to myself as i open the card and start to read. 

dear elly, happy birthday! i can't believe you are 18 because you act like a 5 year old. 

i look up and roll my eyes at him when i read that part, and he shoots me his infamous smile. "you know you do" he teases. i continue to read; 

i am so happy i got to know you this year. i love our friendship so much and i think it's one of the best things that has happened to me this year. maybe even my whole life. keep being you because you are amazing! i hope you enjoy this special day. (obviously you will, you're with me.) - joe

i finish reading and there are tears in my eyes. despite his sarcasm at the end of the note i can't help smiling foolishly. "you're so sweet" is the only thing i can say as joe puts an arm around me. "don't cry on your birthday!" joe says, noticing my happy tears. "i'm so grateful i got to know you too" i tell him, sniffling. i lean against his shoulder for a few seconds, my heart beating wildly partly due to my emotions from reading the card but also because my head is resting on his shoulder. 

joe shifts a little, causing me to look up at him. he smiles down at me and my heart flutters for a second. i think i'm falling for joe jonas.  

clearly, my plan to keep my distance from joe doesn't work because both of us are running around like kids and having a blast. it's hard not to have fun when i'm with him. he makes me happier that i've ever been in a while, and he's so easy to talk to. 

- 

"stop monkeying around, guys" nick says, a tone of annoyance in his voice, but he still chuckles in amusement as i flop down on the sofa in the main area of the tour bus as joe crashes down next to me a second later. 

itell him to stop chasing me!" i pant, sweat rolling down my forehead. only nick, joe and i are on the parked bus because everyone else went for a toilet break before we're off to the concert venue. we'll park there till overnight, because the first show in idaho is held tomorrow. 

nick whacks his brother on the shoulder playfully, earning a glare from an exhausted joe. "all 3 of you are going to kill me someday. thank god i only have a month left here." i say jokingly after joe and i decide to stand outside the bus for some fresh air, leaving nick inside to get his insulin pump before joining us. he's a type one diabetic and needs his pump all the time, even if it's just outside the tour bus. 

joe rolls his eyes but goes quiet. "what do you mean? tour lasts eight months" he says. 

oh, shoot. 

i haven't told him i'm not staying the whole tour. 

"elly?" he asks, and i look at him. "oh, yeah, i'm only staying for a month longer. my dad is going to drop me off in chicago when you guys perform there in a month." joe's face falls and he doesn't even try to hide it. "oh." he says quietly. i feel so bad. "sorry" i offer quietly. seeing his reaction makes me want to stay, but at the same time i want to go back to normal school and see all my friends. joe sighs, smiling sadly as he makes his way up the steps to the tour bus. i follow close behind. "it's okay. i know you have your own life outside this; but i'll miss having you around." before i can reply, he adds, "nick is going to be devastated." 

nick comes out of his room just in time to hear the last line. he looks worried as he glances from joe's crestfallen expression to me. i avoid my gaze as he questions, "why?"  joe looks at his brother. "nah, just that elly's leaving in a month. mr miller's dropping her back home when we tour in chicago." 

silence. 

nick is about to say something but i hear my dad come up the stairs of the tour bus, talking loudly to josh and a few of the crew members. "alright everyone, the bus is departing soon! we should reach the concert venue soon." my dad announces. nick glances at me but doesn't say anything, but his expression mirrors joe's. 

all of us go back to our rooms since the bus is about to leave, so nick doesn't have a chance to say anything. joe follows behind. "i'm sorry" i say as he closes the door to our room, but he shakes his head. "don't be, it's not your fault." he replies, but as i watch him climb onto his top bunk without saying anything else, tears prick the back of my eyes. 

neither joe nor nick talk to me much the rest of the day, so i stay close to kevin during dinner. we're out at a fancy restaurant. kevin knows what's going on by now, and as i slide into the seat next to his, he smiles somewhat comfortingly at me. "don't worry about them, they're just disappointed that you aren't staying longer. but they'll get over it soon." kevin assures me, making me feel slightly better. "thanks kevin" i sigh, taking the menu that's being passed down to us. 

joe and nick are sitting side by side a few chairs away from us. josh is seperating kevin and i from joe and nick, and for once i'm kind of glad. 

after a good dinner, my dad stands up and smiles. "happy birthday again, elly!" he says, and the whole table cheers. i blush as people around us turn to stare. "dad!" i say when he doesn't sit down. 

much to my relief, my dad finally sits down and the clapping dies down. "god, how embarrassing." i say quietly as kevin laughs. i pretend to glare at him for laughing at my expense but he just chuckles. "did you have a good 18th?" he asks as we exit the restaurant. i laugh a little. "well, for most of the day, yes. but it wasn't really fun after telling joe and nick that i'm leaving early. it kinda ruined the mood." i say honestly as we head back to the tour bus. 

"do you want to room with me for a night?" kevin asks. i breathe a sigh of relief; i wasn't sure if i could sleep peacefully knowing joe wasn't happy. "yes please" i tell the oldest jonas brother, and he smiles. "i knew you would. i'll let joe know." kevin says as he goes off to find his brother. 

i pack some of my stuff and bring it over to kevin and nick's room. i'm rummaging through my bag to find my pajamas when the door opens. nick's standing there, his expression unreadable. "hi" i smile, and he flashes me a quick smile. "i'm here to collect my stuff for the night." he tells me, and i nod and stand aside so he can get his stuff. it's awkwardly quiet as i watch him pack his bag and sling it over his shoulder. the way his muscles move as he lifts his bag up catch my attention but i force myself to look away. don't go there, eliana.

nick clears his throat and i look up to see him standing in the doorway. "goodnight" he says awkwardly. "night" i say. i'm spared from any more awkwardness as kevin comes in. nick retreats to the room that he's sharing with joe. "what's up with them?" i ask kevin after i brush my teeth. kevin sighs as he looks up from his phone. "i have no idea. just wait a couple days and they'll come round. i can talk to them about it if you want, though." he offers. "it's okay, i'll just wait for them to say something." i sigh as i climb the ladder to the top bunk. the moment i lie down, i can smell the familiar cologne nick wears on the sheets. 

i don't know how to describe the smell except that it smells fresh, and definitely pleasent. below, kevin turns off the small light that's next to his bed. i do the same. "goodnight kevin." i say. "g'night" he says, yawning." the room is pitch black, and within minutes, there's total silence. i'm sure kevin's sound asleep, but i'm wide awake. 

finally, after hours of tossing and turning, i fall asleep.