ethereal [joe jonas]

chapter fourteen

the next morning when i wake up, we're already at the concert venue. kevin must have heard me sitting up because he greets me, "did you sleep well?" 

"not really" i reply truthfully. "i'm sorry! was i talking in my sleep?" kevin says immediately. i laugh at how sweet he's being. "no, not at all!" i reply, not wanting him to think it was his fault. "i just had a lot on my mind." i admit. 

"i understand, if i were in your shoes, i would too." kevin says. i have a feeling that he knows something i don't. "what do you mean?" i ask, and there's silence. finally, he sighs. "i don't know if it's my place to tell you, elly." 

i laugh nervously. "you're scaring me." 

"it's nothing bad, don't worry" kevin says immediately. after a long pause, he says, "i'm going to tell you something but only because i would want to know this if i was in your position. but make me a promise; don't let anyone know where you heard this from." 

my heart beats faster. did something happen? "no, of course i won't." i answer. kevin sighs as if he's contemplating whether he's making the right desicion or not. "okay" he says, unsure. "you can trust me." i tell him as i climb down the ladder and sit next to him on his bed. "promise?" he asks, and i nod. my heart is thumping wildly inside my chest. "promise." 

"okay, so... where do i begin?" kevin says nervously, scratching the back of his neck. he pauses and looks at me. "don't freak out, but, um, n-nick has feelings for you." 

what. the. hell. 

i stare at him in disbelief. "are you sure?" i ask, trying to process what i'd just heard. nick jonas has feelings for me. 

kevin nods. "he told me himself." i'm sitting in stunned silence, but kevin continues. "remember how joe sat next to you on the flight here? yeah, well, nick was supposed to sit next to you but he got nervous and switched with joe." 

my jaw drops. "i-i know it's a lot to handle." kevin says nervously. "yeah... but thanks for telling me." i say as i put my head in my hands. that explains a lot of things. nick being so reserved at the start of tour, for one. no wonder he was so shy around me. and nick being a little protective of me and not letting joe throw that cake tin at me? probably because he liked me. 

"oh my god" i whisper as i look at kevin, shock still written all over my face. "yeah" kevin mutters. "i apprecate you telling me, kevin." i tell him. it must be hard to tell me something he'd probably promised his brother not to. "well then..." i trail off as i try to gather my thoughts. kevin glances at me. "what?" 

"well if nick has feelings for me then why are both he and joe avoiding me? ever since i told them i'm leaving early, they haven't talked to me much except when nick said goodnight to me. it just doesn't make sense." i rant. i'm getting frustrated at the signals they're sending me and i feel confused.  kevin sighs. "i dunno, that's joe's way of avoiding the problem. nick is more open to talk about problems but you also gotta remember that he has feelings for you. he's probably  nervous around you." i groan and flop down on the bed. kevin smiles sympathetically. "this is so complicated." i say, a sigh escaping my lips. 

"just act like i didn't tell you any of this. nick will tell you when he feels like he's ready." kevin reminds me, and i nod. "i won't break my promise." i answer as i exit the room to go to the main area. i need some time to myself, and it's pretty early so there's probably no one there. i still can't believe nick has feelings for me; do i even feel the same way? i should be overjoyed about this, right? 

nick's sitting on the couch by himself. i see him from a distance. 

oh, great. 

i consider going back to the room, but i realise this is the perfect opportunity to try to talk to him more. he looks startled when he hears me walking towards him, and turns around. when he sees it's me, he smiles  warmly. "hi elly" his hair is dishevelled, but he looks cute in his white t-shirt and black shorts. i return his smile, pretending that i know nothing about his feelings for me. 

pretend, pretend, pretend. fake it. fake it till you make it, i chant in my head as he pats the seat next to him and smiles again.

i take a seat next to him. he's cupping a cup of coffee in his hands. he notices me shivering a little and hands the cup to me. i take it from him, and look up to smile at me. i notice he's already been looking at me and he glances away, but i see a blush creeping up his cheeks. "so you're leaving in a month, huh?" he says suddenly. i nod and he sighs. "on the bright side, we still have a month together." nick says quietly. he pauses, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly and instantly reminding me of kevin. "i'm sorry for not talking to you more on your birthday yesterday; i was just surprised at the news. so was joe." nick doesn't meet my gaze. 

"hey, it's okay. i get it was kinda sudden." i say, not wanting him to feel bad. "mhm" nick responds. i can tell he has something on his mind, and i think i know what it is. the sofa is huge, so i put my legs up and nick chuckles before doing the same. 

before long, both of us are talking like old pals, nick sneaking glances at me now and then. "so your dad brings you along whenever he goes on tour?" nick asks, and i nod in reply. "yeah, he wants me to take over this company when i'm older." i pause. "but i don't want to." i mutter under my breath, turning around to make sure my dad hadn't come into the main area. 

"then why don't you tell him?" i give a short laugh. "oh, believe me, i have. but he insists on it. my two older siblings are more headstrong than me, i guess, and they got to do what they want. my dad was upset but he got over it, but now he's inistent on me taking over the company." 

"because you're his last chance." nick finishes my sentence. i look up at him; surprised. "exactly."