"What?" I stared at him through my drenched eyes. "How do you know-"
"I had it too Ash."
"No fucking way."
"That was pretty intense," he smirks. "I know you think of me in that way Ashton. And it's okay."
"Lee, in what universe would any of this be okay?!" I whisper-yell.
"It's all up to you. You choose what we do. I want you to be in control." He reaches down and lifts my chin, making my eyes look into his dark ones. His god damn beautiful self.
"You're..." I speak up, his face brightens up, in hopes of me complimenting him, "...you're married." I spit out, his face drops. I turn towards my own bedroom. "It's not right. It'll never be right Lee. As much as I want it, you are married. And a rockstar, and a family friend.
"I get it, babe, I didn't want to push you-"
"No Tommy, don't think of it that way. Okay? It's just really fucking weird we had that dream and it wasn't real."
"It's not real. Got it." He sighs out. I watched as his entire body language and demeanor changed. "I'll see you at the Funeral, Ashton."
The way he said my name left a sour taste in my mouth, almost making me physically cringe. Ouch.
-
Just like the dream we all had a little gathering and drank to my grandfather's name. I didn't leave my dad at any point. He was so strong and independent. I was so proud of him.
Tommy was always in the corner of my eye. He sat and chatted with others at our kitchen bar.
"You gonna be okay kid?" My dad asks, "your graduation is coming up soon too, then your nineteenth birthday, then your marriage..." he trails on, making me laugh. "You're growing up on me Ash, it's not fair."
"Don't worry Dad, I'll make you proud." I hug him. And I hug him tight. We don't usually have touchy conversations like that, but when we did it meant so much.
"Go get me another glass of your grandpas' whiskey?" I nod and take his glass. I walk past the bar where Tommy was sitting, and grab the bottle that was just across from him. He tried to ignore my presence, and I the same, but it was hard. This man-made me feel all the feels at once. I wasn't sure what I wanted at the time and maybe I still don't. But deep down I knew I wanted him.
"You want some?" I blurt out as I pour my dad and I drinks. Tommy lifts his head and looks at me. Instant butterflies in my stomach. I try and keep my composure.
"Uhm, sure." He purses his lips and slides his glass just a bit. I look into his hazel eyes, they were soft. He wasn't mad, but more upset. Maybe he'd forgotten about it.
But I didn't want him forgetting, I wanted him to continue trying. I wanted him to have me.
"I can't reach," I mumble. I take the two filled glasses and walk around the counter, standing in front of Tommy.
"I can pour it if-"
"I got it, Lee." I look into his eyes again as we're just a few inches apart.
Purposely, I stand in between his legs and extend my arm to grab the bottle. His eyes were burning into my skin, he was confused but he didn't mind me standing so close to him.
I pour the rest of the bottle into his glass and turn to hand it to him. "Oh wait," I grab a wedge of lemon that was sitting on the cutting board. I squeeze it into his glass and place the wedge on the rim of the glass. I hand it to him. He gracefully takes it. As I make continuous eye contact with him, I had a little smirk on my lips. I wanted him intrigued. I wanted him weak for me. Just as I was for him. He already knew it, and I wanted him to show me. "I know you like a little lemon in your drinks," I mumble only loud enough for him to hear. As he continues to look at me damn near speechless, I place my lemon-soaked thumb into my mouth. Making sure my tongue swirls around my thumb as if it was...you know. His lips slowly part and his mouth gape open. As if he was going to say something. But he just stared in awe.
"Cheers," I say innocently, grabbing the glasses and returning to my father. I felt good. It was probably the alcohol my father let me have, but I definitely needed it.
As I return to my father, Tommy immediately gets up, shoots back the whiskey, then passes the crowd towards the stairs.
"Hey man, I gotta use the bathroom, is it cool if I use the one upstairs?" He pats on my dad's shoulder. He seemed in a hurry. It was obvious what was wrong with him.
I 'accidentally' turned him on.
I couldn't help the mischievous smile creeping onto my face. But I got what I wanted. I wanted him to know I was interested.
A few minutes later I tell my father that I needed to get some rest because I needed to go dress shopping for my graduation with Cameron tomorrow morning. He instantly kissed me goodnight and I booked it upstairs.
The bathroom was next to my bedroom, so it wasn't evident that I was going to go see him. I didn't know exactly what I was going to do when I encounter him, but that was the magic of it all.
Even though I had a few glasses of whiskey, my actions were controllable. I knew what I was doing. I knew what I wanted. I've only ever wanted him in one way or another. There wasn't a single fucking reason why I should reject him.
The nerve soon came into peak as I stood at the door. Just like in the dream, I just stood there contemplating whether or not I should open the door and see where things go. Or I should just walk into my room and call it a night.
That's the best thing to do right now, right? I shouldn't do this. He doesn't want me to do this.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
I'm second-guessing myself which was probably the best for the best of us. I shook my head and walked towards my room. Just as I was about to shut my door, something blocks it from completely shutting. I open the door and see what it was.
Who it was.
His long brown locks of hair were thrown up into an extremely messy bun. He wasn't drunk, I could tell.
"Ash-"
I cut him off, "Kiss me. Please." I begged, whined almost.
Tommy takes two quick steps towards me and grabs my face, instantly attaching his lips to mine. I melt into his touch. His hands found their way up and down my body. I finally give him permission to touch me, and I felt like I was on cloud nine.
"Ashton?" A third voice is heard behind us. Our lips quickly detach and we both turn to see who it was.
"Cameron-"
-
1223
03/15/2021
AHHHHHH IM BACK LMFAO ENJOY.
