His Spark, Her Soul

Chapter 4

Niki raced over with all the belongings she could carry, "I'm so excited!" She grinned widely and her optics glowing with happiness and I felt my spark shift in a way I had never felt before. It was odd, yet comforting. With our help, Niki was swifty moved into my apartment's spare bedroom. She danced around the room and flopped onto the bed, giggling like a sparkling dropped into a candy store. Breakdown helped her decorate the space as Knockout followed me into the kitchen. "Even though I tricked you into doing this, I appreciate you accepting it." He leaned against the island sitting in the middle as I started a pot of coffee. "You drink coffee this late in the cycle?" He questioned and I sighed, "Just figure it would calm my nerves." He gave me a curious look, "Ratchet, you of all bots should know that coffee won't calm your nerves. Wait...you are nervous?" I turned around and faced him, "Yes." He walked over and shut off the pot, "Nervous how?" "My spark feels like it's beating weird but it seems to only be around Niki." I replied and Knockout smirked, "Catching feelings are we?" "What?" I exclaimed in utter confusion. "Don't be stupid, Knockout, it's just nerves over the new responsibility I have to care for my roommate." He shook his helm before walking into the other room, asking something of the other two. I turned back around to the coffee pot, staring at I as I pondered over Knockout's stupidity.

~several months later~
"Knock! Can you believe we graduate tonight!?" Niki ran over and hugged to cherry red mech before they both bounced around like fools. "I know! I'm so excited Doll!" He replied, "You must come over for beauty tips." I tried to ignore the jealousy that swelled up in my spark and I let out a small huff. "Ratchet? Aren't you excited!?" Niki asked and I looked up at her, "Yes, I'm excited that we finish school and now can actually put our talent to good use." "Well, I'm going to be taking Niki for the rest of the day. She needs a new coat of paint and a but of buffing but she'll look good as new." Knockout grinned, kind of smugly and I just wanted to wipe the smile from his face as he wrapped his arm around Niki's waist and led her away.
I wouldn't see her until that night at the ceremony. Knockout had outdone himself with his little beauty project. I swear I lost my breath when she came into view.
Niki had fresh paint and had been buffed to shine like a star. She walked over, blushing, "Do I look okay?" I shook my helm and cleared my throat, swiftly trying to compose myself "You look lovely." I could feel my faceplates heat up when she grinned, "You look just as wonderful Ratchet!"

I paused in my story as the rest came back in a full on tidal wave. The horrors that happened only mere months of our graduation gripped onto my spark tightly and I let out a breath. Did I really want to continue speaking? Did I really want to remember, to relive her death over again?? "Ratchet, what happened next...?" I recognized the voice that belonged to Arcee as she walked over and gently placed her servo onto my shoulder. "I don't wish to continue." I huffed out. "Old friend..." Optimus started but I cut him off, "No, Optimus! You...you know what happens. You know what happened to her. You were there!!" I looked up at him, my optics full of rage but beneath that sorrow. He stared back with guilt and sorrow. He then lowed his gaze to the floor, "Yes, I was there, Ratchet." His voice soft. His whole body language began to change from stoic to complete guilt. He knows what I mean, he played a role in her death. I know he has regret it since the beginnings of war. "He was there?" A small voice asked and I neglected to see the arrival of the children. I glanced over to see Miko, Rafael, and Jack standing on the platform all looking at us as Rafael asked the question. I stood, full of rage and I wanted to scream at them to go home and mind their own business but as soon as I made eye contact, the rage left me and I felt like a hollow husk. Optimus walked closer before he spoke, "I aided in her death." His words echoed through the silent base followed by complete and utter shock from everyone.