Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
NOBARA PICKS A meat-heavy slab of sushi from your bento. You watch as your last soldier is devoured by the hungry she-beast. There is pain in your eyes. Nobara ends up laughing with a mouth full of rice at the teary-eyed sorrow in your eyes.
"Why are you laughing?" you question sharply. "You killed Jimmy!"
She sets her chopsticks down on the picnic table, chewing with obvious satisfaction.
"Well at least you won't be arrested anymore. If you'd continued with eating him you would be in jail." She wipes at her mouth in delicate motions. You roll your eyes at the genteel facade. "I saved you. So now I'll be put in jail. Lord knows you could never deal with the suckers there."
"Uh huh. Why is that so?"
"'Cause your ass is too big for the pervs in county jail. They'd never be able to keep their hands off you," she says nonchalantly. Your features contort in horror.
My precious ass, you think worriedly. Until a larger problem presents itself to you.
"But... your chest is also huge." You squeeze at the air with wiggling fingers. Now it is her turn to look at you in horror. "How would they be able to resist you?"
"You could just go together then," Yuji suggests innocently with a golden brown pole of tempura to his lips. "Then you could beat all of them up."
Megumi snorts into a glass of iced tea. "Yeah. Remember that one time Kugisaki kicked someone in the balls just because they asked for your number, (Y/N)?"
"You did?!" you gasp at Nobara. "I even told you to leave the poor boy alone! Did you sneak into his house or something?!"
"Fushiguro, you son of a bitch!" Nobara wags a minatory fist in his amused face then turns to you with an ingratiating smile plastered on her face. "Oh no, honey. No, of course I didn't hurt him. Fushiguro..." She glowers at him. "Was only trying to get to me. You know how he is."
She laughs nervously. You only respond with satire in your raised eyebrows.
"Really now?"
She continues to wheeze in forced laughter. You can only sigh.
"Well... whatever, honey, if you say so. But if I find out you kicked Eren in the balls..."
"I didn't! I swear I didn't!" she insists. On other occasions she would have been more open to admitting her protective exploits, but she is immensely aware of how much you care for this guy.
Just because he has nice green eyes and a stupidly good body and a cute face, she thinks to herself.
It's a good thing I'm gay, she then reflects. Never taking her eyes from you.
