First Light | Steve Rogers (Book Two)

Chapter Thirty-Six: Love Letters

The girl gasped in wonder as she scanned Vision with a strange device. An image of the stone seemed to be projected from the palm of her hand and I could practically hear Banner lose his mind. "The structure is polymorphic" she told us, staring at it as it slowly rotated.

Banner cleared his throat and tore his eyes away from the projection, "Right, we had to attach each neuron non-sequentially"

"Why didn't you just reprogram the synapses to work collectively?"

There was a pause, "Because... we didn't think of it"

"I'm sure you did your best"

Wanda was still worriedly watching Vision, "Can you do it?"

The girl nodded, "Yes, but there are more than two trillion neurons here. One misalignment could cause a cascade of circuit failures. It will take time, brother"

She glanced over at T'Challa, who nodded silently. Steve glanced out of one of the large windows at the clear sky, "How long?"

"As long as you can give me"

I sighed heavily as I sat on the window ledge of the guest bedroom, staring out at the night sky. The stars were scattered above, there must have been at least a million more than those visible at the compound.

The door closed slowly and I heard someone approach me, moving slightly so that he could sit behind me. I felt Steve's arms wrap around my waist, pulling me closer until my back was against his chest. He rested his head on my shoulder, tracing circles on my arm as I continued to watch the sky.

"There's nothing yet," he sighed quietly, "Okoye said that they could arrive tomorrow afternoon, if we're lucky. Maybe you should relax, they'll alert us if anything happens"

"I am relaxing. I'm watching the stars"

He began to press gentle kisses to my shoulder, "You haven't properly rested since Copenhagen. Please, just try to get some sleep"

I rolled my eyes and leaned in to his touch, "I'm not sleeping while there's an army of aliens who could attack at any second"

I felt him move to get up, yelping when he began to carry me towards the bed. "How about this?" he asked as he set me down and crawled in next to me, "You get some shuteye for a few hours while I keep watch, then we swap"

"Fine"

I finally tore my eyes away from the sky, looking down at Steve's sleeping form. He was curled up next to me, his head slightly brushing my leg. He looked so peaceful, his tired eyes finally closed and allowing him to rest. Things had been so tense since the Framework, both of us struggling to forget our other lives.

We were both dealing with different traumas, although neither of them were painless and easy to forget. In that world, he had been in he exact same position as Bucky, forced to murder thousands of people for a despicable organisation. It went against everything he believed in. He finally understood his best friend's pain on a whole new level, but that didn't make it any better

I couldn't help but smile as I watched him, seeing his chest slowly rise and fall. My fingers hesitantly reached to brush a golden lock out of his face. I froze when he shifted slightly, releasing a long sigh of relief when he simply nuzzled into my hand.

Something suddenly caught my attention. A small piece of paper was poking out of the front pocket of his bag, the words 'For Rory ' written on it in Steve's unmistakeable handwriting. I slowly got up and crouched next to the bag, deliberating whether or not to take it out. Pulling it out of the bag as quietly as possible, I unfolded it and began to read.

Rory,
There are so many things I would like to say to you. Unfortunately, I don't think I can trust myself to say any of it out loud without saying the wrong words. I hope this letter can explain it all.

From the moment I saw you, I knew that there was something special about you. I was crazy for you, I still am. Guess I wasn't subtle, because everyone on the team picked up on it, except for you.

It's not just because you're beautiful or a great fighter, it's because you're an incredible person. You try to deny that you care, but you still go out of your way to save people. It still scares me half to death when you get hurt, but you always end up that way because you've risked your safety to protect someone else. You're smart and brave and you always stand up for what you believe in.

I know that you're still shaken by what happened and I get it. I would never expect you to just forget about it. I'll do anything to prove it to you, anything to make you see that you are not alone.

When you fell and I carried you out of that base, I could barely look at you. Every single day you were in that coma, I sat by your bed and I waited. Each day of waiting hurt me more than I could ever tell you, but it was worth it to finally see you smile. It was worth it because I knew that you were alive.

I told you something. You forgot it when you fell and I was honestly scared to tell you in case you didn't feel the same way. I desperately wanted to tell you, but I didn't. Every time I see you, I feel my heart swell and I can't stop myself from smiling. Even thinking about you makes me grin like crazy. When we're not near each other, it's like time slows down. I'm not one of those guys who'll say anything to get what they want, so I hope you'll believe what I have to say.

I love you, Rory. I've been too scared to say anything, but it's true. I'm so in love with you, it's not even funny at this point. I'm the luckiest guy in the world for even being your friend, let alone your boyfriend. It's fine if you don't feel the same way, I just can't lie anymore.
Steve

I stared at the letter in shock, my hands beginning to tremble slightly as I reluctantly folded the letter up and put it back in his bag. There was a sound of sheets rustling and I span around, seeing that Steve was still fast asleep.

Sighing heavily, I sat down on the window ledge with a blanket wrapped around me and continued to watch the sky as dawn gradually came.