The girls trudged into the Great Hall.Stoick The Vast,Chief of the Hooligans,O Hear His Name And Tremble,UGH UGH, was seated on his mighty throne at one side of the hall.There were other Heroes-To-Be,playing Bashyball in a barbaric fashion even for Vikings,which involved cursing and swearing,Vikings tearing at one another with their TEETH,plus the ball being spat and stomped on.
"That's nasty,"Amadora mumbled,hiding behind Chloe to shield herself from the terrible view of the Bashyball game.
"One oyster on Hildegard's team to win,"Luna yelled confidentially to Alyssa.
"I take your bet,"Alyssa replied in equal tone and volume.They watched the game with wide eyes.
One of Hildegard's teammates,a particularly nasty boy called Garfield,stepped on the other team's captain with a sickening crunch.BUT THE RIVALLING CAPTAIN WAS FASTER!He sat up,grabbed Garfield's elbow,and twisted his arm barbarically.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"yelled Garfield with gusto.
"And that's a point to Team Lumpetsnout!"bellowed Goldum,Garfield's younger sister,who was refereeing.Goldum was usually an excellent Bashyball player,but she had injured her arm in a previous match.
Luna passed Alyssa an oyster.Alyssa grinned cheekily.The four made their way up to Chief Stoick."Chief Stoick,excuse me.Where is the How To Train Your Dragon book?"Luna called politely.
"It's in the fireplace,"Stoick waved an airy hand."Shoo!"
"Sheesh,"Alyssa muttered to Chloe as they forced their way to the fireplace.She took out the large,shiny golden book.
Luna snatched the book from her.They started fighting over it."Stop,"Amadora protested weakly.They emerged from the vicious battle,Luna holding on to the book.
"To Mommy,with love from your dearest Yob."she read."Chapter the First(And the Last).How to train your dragon:YELL AT IT.(The louder the better.)The end."
"That's it?"Alyssa scowled.
"I think so,"Amadora said uncertainly.
Alyssa looked grim."I daresay we're in trouble."she muttered darkly.
"We'll figure it out,"Luna replied.
YOU ARE READING
How (Not) To Please Your Dragon
FanfictionHow was life AcTUALLY on Berk,without the rogue screaming dragons,and the annoying occasional witch and villain trying to kill you?Find out in this book. Credits to @consultingdemiwitch for the cover.She asked for me to do so. ⚠︎On hold⚠︎