Welcome to the BONE CULT, Friends!!!🦴🦴🦴 (Aka the Keiji Appreciation Book)

Keiji Reads the Milk Wiki Article, BUT...

A/N: 99% based on that one audio where Seth reads the Bone wiki page in Keiji's voice.
Writing this also gave me an idea for another Keiji Iketsugi headcanon! ;D

Keiji: Hello there~ Welcome back to another ASMR session with me. Today I will be reading from the Milk wiki to promote good health and the benefits of drinking milk. Milk is good for your skeleton you know...I only harvest the healthiest of bones *Insert Keiji's laugh here.* Let's get started, shall we? ;)

Keiji: "This article is about the fluid produced by the mammary glands of mammals. For the milk-like beverages derived from plants, see Plant milk. For other uses of the word, see Milk (disambiguation).
"Dairy milk" redirects here. For the line of chocolate products, see Cadbury Dairy Milk."

Keiji: "Milk is a nutrient-rich liquid food produced by the mammary glands of mammals. It is the primary source of nutrition for young mammals, including breastfed human infants before they are able to digest solid food.[1] Early-lactation milk is called colostrum, which contains antibodies that strengthen the immune system and thus reduces the risk of many diseases. It holds many other nutrients,[2] including protein and lactose. Interspecies consumption of milk is not uncommon, particularly among humans, many of whom consume the milk of other mammals.[3][4]

As an agricultural product, dairy milk is collected from farm animals. Dairy farms produced around 730 million tonnes of milk in 2011,[5] from 260 million dairy cows.[6] India is the world's largest producer of milk, and is the leading exporter of skimmed milk powder, yet it exports few other milk products.[7][8] The ever-increasing rise in domestic demand for dairy products and a large demand-supply gap could lead to India being a net importer of dairy products in the future.[9] New Zealand, Germany and the Netherlands are the largest exporters of milk products.[10] China and Russia were the world's largest importers of milk and milk products until 2016 when both countries became self-sufficient, contributing to a worldwide glut of milk.[11]

Throughout the world, more than six billion people consume milk and-

[Keiji suddenly stops as he notices you drinking choccy milk instead of regular milk]

Keiji:...Is that....chocolate milk??? *Cringes*

Keiji: Do you have any idea how unhealthy that is for your bones? No chocolate milk will be consumed in my presence while I am discussing the origin of milk.

[You cautiously put the choccy milk down as he stares intently at you]

Keiji: Thank you...Now where was I? Ah. "...more than six billion people consume milk and milk products. Between 750 and 900 million people live in dairy farming households.[12]

Etymology and terminology. The term "milk" comes from "Old English meoluc (West Saxon), milc (Anglian), from Proto-Germanic *meluks "milk" (source also of Old Norse mjolk, Old Frisian melok, Old Saxon miluk, Dutch melk, Old High German miluh, German Milch, Gothic miluks)".[13]

In food use, from 1961, the term milk has been defined under Codex Alimentarius standards as: "the normal mammary secretion of milking animals obtained from one or more milkings without either addition to it or extraction from it, intended for consumption as liquid milk or for further processing."[14] The term dairy relates to animal milk and animal milk production.

A substance secreted by pigeons to feed their young is called "crop milk" and bears some resemblance to mammalian milk, although it is not consumed as a milk substitute.[15]

Non-dairy milks. Further information: Plant milk. The definition above precludes non-animal products which resemble dairy milk in color and texture, such as almond milk, coconut milk, rice milk, and soy milk. In English, the word "milk" has been used to refer to "milk-like plant juices" since 1200 AD.[16] Traditionally a variety of non-dairy products have been described with the word milk, including the traditional digestive remedies milk of magnesia[17] and milk of bismuth.[18] Latex, the complex inedible emulsion that exudes from the stems of certain plants, is generally described as milky and is often sold as "rubber milk" because of its white appea-