Rolling Stones | Jinson

Headache that I want

"What??!"

"What what !? I asked you for a date !"

Jinyoung clears his throat because his voice was stuck somewhere and he had to pull it out to talk 'fucking talkkkk!! Don't get frozen like this ,you idiot'

"Jackson I am really busy ... I really don't have time for these game dates of yours" Jinyoung says averting his eyes from those chocolate brown sweet eyes .. he can't let himself sink in those beaut- 'snap out of it you moron'

"I am serious !! Why do you think I am joking !?! See I am dressed up, holding a bouquet of flowers-- oh fuck I forgot it in my car ...but I brought it ! I planned a perfect date for both us !!! Do you really think I am planning to work so hard just for some casual date game as you said !! I am serious !"jackson said with a serious- determined look

"You did all this even last time when we were actually playing "the date" ... Hmm now what do you have to say about that ... So even for nothing.. you did all that! .... You are quite a player Jackson! " Jinyoung said with a bit of hurt feels within and cold expressions not even glancing once at that beautiful being standing-- 'jinyoung-ah can you get a grip on ur self ... If you keep on going like that you won't be able to stop yourself ... Even though he looks genuine and maybe..he is ...you can't do this ....stay away from him ...you have to stay away from him...' Jinyoung kept talking to himself to stop his heart from falling deeper .... but That can't be stopped ... He has already fallen too deep

"Park Jinyoung ...
I am sorry ... I have been lying to you all this time ..."jackson said in low voice

Jinyoung finally looked up and saw those chocolate brown eyes reflecting his pain.. 'how is that possible..snap out of it .. and if it's not my pain then why are you hurt seunaah '  

 "I did that all... Cause I wanted to be with you .... I was just mesmerized by you as soon I laid my eyes on you ...
You are just perfect... Handsome .... And totally my type.... I really wanted to lash out a lot that day on our first meeting but .. I couldn't .... Even those few things were hard to say ... I was soooo irritated ...why you have such a nice face ... When you are such a devil  .... I just didn't wanted to see you again .... I had my ego I can't fall for you ... But then ...we met again.... And again you were the devil who just had to get drunk and start pulling me deeper into the hell .... You are defination of sin ...you can just make every single men beg on their knees just with thst smile of urs .... You know how hard it was to control my self ... I lost atlast as we both know but even for that small time it was  really hard ... And you know what and all went down after that.... But after that I had just one thought in my mind .... I want to know him ... Want to be with him ... Want to see that smile ... Want you to go crazy for me even when you r sober.... I wanted to see the imperfect/sloppy sides of our perfectionist as I saw that day ..and I wanted to be the only one to see them.... And so that's how I came with this nonsense of an idea but you agreed to it! Actually it was Mark hyung's idea...I shouldn't take credits ..hahaa ... So I tried my best so you also start feeling those things towards me ... But I guess ...I wasn't good enough... And I guess it might be because the very start of this was wrong at the first place... I should have been honest..but ... But I'll try my best this time and start with being honest with you.... I'll make my self good enough for you ..to be with you ... Can't you give me a chance.... ?"Jackson was almost begging at this point ..his voice so soft and raw ...all emotions bared out for Jinyoung

'whattt!!!??!! Yesßss yesßss yessssssss a thousand times yesss!!!' "No I can't ...sorry ...you can leave my office now " Jinyoung said as he looked down quickly ... This much eye contact was too much for his already pounding heart ... He wanted to just kiss those lips ...those eyes and just agree to anything and everything ... How couldn't he see this earlier ... Who would do such things for some random being and a fake date..  it was there all the time...the honesty... In his eyes... in his suggested dates...in his smile ..in his words .... he was so happy that his feelings were being reciprocated ... He wasn't only one feeling this way ...it was actually from both sides .... He just wanted to kiss the life out of him and just keep him to himself .... The source of his energy ...his fulfillment ... He is rich..too rich... but that money can't make him feel complete... He can't be himself with his family ... But with him he can be anything and this being will accept any form of him... The very thought of that was making Jinyoung's heart soo full ..but he can't accept this ... His mom... Won't agree... His dad doesn't even know yet... If he gets to know... may be... he'll also stand with his wife... And if something happens to jackson... It's fine I have been like this almost my whole life .. I can continue like that ... There is no need to drag jackson in this... I can't be selfish ... Just leave jackson ....