WITH YOU- I Never Had A Choice ✔️

CHAPTER FORTY ONE

AVERY

"How are you?" Brad sits down at the edge of the bed with a pained expression on his face.

"I'm good, " I say in a raspy voice. I am tired and all the yelling at Dylan made it worse. Well, that and the fact that I started my periods. For now, the cramps aren't that bad, there's a thin pain in my abdomen but with all other pains all over my body, it seems a little different. I know it might get a bit worse.

"Doesn't seem like it, " Brad remarks eyeing the scars on my arms and face. 

"Yeah, well...it was that car yk. The one which was following me."

"The black truck?!" He almost yells. I nod.

"Fuck!" Clenching his jaw, he looks away from my face. "How did this happen?" He asks after a long pause.

"It hit me twice but the second time, it couldn't hit me as hard as it was supposed to because of Meli. Our phones got exchanged and she was coming to return it to me. She saw the truck before it hit me for the second time so it did get slowed down seeing an approaching car and ran off."

"I didn't think it would get so dangerous! I even told Dylan about the truck." He says.

"When?"

"That night at the restaurant, when we both were alone." He looks at me slowly and says, "he was really scared you know."

I stay quiet and tilt my head towards the quilt, the fingers of my left hand drawing random shapes. "He was scared today."

"I can imagine, " Brad states quietly. I nod slowly, not looking at him, barely paying any attention. Before today, I probably would have brushed off the fact that Dylan cares and cares so much. But now...I've decided to give myself a chance and let go till the marriage gets over but then what? What happens after the three months are over? I don't want to get attached to him.

"He really cares a lot for you, " my eyes shift to Brad. I see approval in his expression. Giving me a small smile, he nods.

I gulp and look down again. I can not get attached to him, and I'm already halfway through it. I know I'll leave after three months, he knows I'll leave after three months. He cares because that's his nature to care about people but I am not that. I can not let all my guards down.

"That's his nature, " I mutter.

Frowning, Brad shakes his head. "No, I mean he cares for you differently. He can do anything to keep you safe and make you happy." He stops and a warm smile stretches across his face, "and you seem happy when you are with him."

I stare blankly at his face, not knowing how to respond. His words aren't false. I have even accepted that to Dylan. "Yeah...I am. He is cool to be around."

"So, you're telling I am not, " Brad lifts one of his eyebrows and asks. Laughing, I nod my head. He leaves a playful snort and then joins me. Slowly, as we stop he asks, "you know what I mean, right?"

I nod and give him a tight smile, "yes, I do." There's a knock at the door and Dylan peeps in.

"Hey, sorry to bother you guys but can I bring your dinner up here now, Avery? You need to take the medicine. And Brad you should stay for dinner."

"Oh, no-no. I'll take off. Thanks though, " Brad says getting up.

I gently lean forward and touch his and say, "I think you should stay for dinner too." 

"No, I've got some work left, I'll come by some other time." I pout up and him. Chuckling, he leans over and plants a kiss on my forehead. "Love you."

"Love you too, " I smile at him. He straightens up and walks across the room.

He stops in front of Dylan and holds out his hand. Dylan shakes his hand and says, "thanks for coming, man."

Brad turns his head and smiles at me then looks at Dylan and says, "had to." Giving an appreciative smile, they let go of their hands. "See you soon."

"Yeah..." Brad leaves and I look at Dylan. "I'll go to bring your dinner." And he is gone leaving me with my thoughts and the newfound fear of attachment. Did I make a mistake by deciding to let go of myself? What if I get attached? Can I bear to lose someone else too?

I know the answer to all these questions but somewhere deep in my heart, I want to risk it all and live in the moment. I want to get up and shout that I don't care what the consequences are. That I am ready to forget about my fears but that part is so little and insignificant, that I can never choose it to be my better judgement.

I look at the window on the far end beside the cupboard. The room is dimly lit and that part is almost dark so the moonlight can be seen falling on the carpeted floor. Shadows of the dancing trees are creating an eerie atmosphere for the fears to bloom. A thin shiver rises my spine, forcing me to close my eyes. My shoulders get heavy. The scene of my parents being lowered to the grown flashes under my eyelid followed by Marc. The fear cannot be ignored. I want to open my eyes and push it all away but as if the other part of me wants to make me feel that I can not do it another time.

"Brought you your dinner, wifey, " Dylan's voice pulls me out of my mind and I snap my eyes open to look at him. Smiling, he opens the bed table and places it over my legs. "I know you're tired but just a bit of food, and I won't bug you anymore."

I stare at his innocent face as he starts to put the tray on the table. He might be older than me, he might be a big businessman, but for me, he is that innocent person that can melt anyone's heart. I have grown to adore everything about this man. His smile, his eyes, his voice everything.

I might not be losing him the way I lost my parents or Marc but I will. Just as the deal ends, we will part our ways. If I let myself go now, will I able to stop myself from falling in love?

"Oh, by the way, Bear is eating downstairs. I'll bring him here after you're done." He walks up to the closet and keeps the folded towel inside.

I know the answer...

"Take me to my room."