HuaLian is my Religion || Fanfiction

From your Most Devout Believer

//i've chosen to call Hua Cheng "Hua Chengzhu" because it's a poem from me (glassEyed, the human) to him, and i can't see myself calling him by any other name//

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Hua Chengzhu
Hua Chengzhu
Hua Chengzhu
Hua Chengzhu
Your name is the only prayer I know,
So forgive me if I chant it like my life depends on it;
Sometimes, I think it does.
Hua Chengzhu, do you know,
Sometimes, I am envious of your faith.
I wonder what it feels like to have a god,
I wonder what it feels like to believe,
I wonder what it feels like to have strength -
We're all cowards, here, you see.
We're afraid, so much, all the time,
That we're now afraid to not be afraid.
Hua Chengzhu,
The world may call you arrogant
But I know why you choose to turn your back on us -
We deserve it, after all.
We are flesh and blood of rotten desires and broken dreams.
Our gods are as filthy as us,
Our faith as shallow as our words.
The common people don't deserve to be saved
(Don't tell His Highness I said that, it'll make him sad)
We cannot be saved
(You know that, don't you?)
Hua Chengzhu,
I chant your name, not in hopes for a miracle or a blessing.
I chant your name over and over again,
To drown out the mechanical buzzing, beeping, banging, bashing
To block out the cries, the chatter, the cacophony, the clashes
Of this world.

Hua Chengzhu,

I chant your name because, though we are creatures of no faith,

This nameless one wants something to believe in
(I really do)
And that's something you understand, don't you,
Chengzhu?