Stand By Me

chapter six; The Body

We follow the tracks all the way to the dead end Lee talked about. "Comin' through the woods I bet we saved over an hour," I say as we come to a stop.

"Lee?"

"Yeah?" I glance at him, "This the Back Harlow road?" He nods, "Yep."

"Brower-kid must be round here some place. Lee, you and Perry watch the left side of the tracks, we'll take the right."

"Alright," Lee says as we split to look for the body of Ray Brower. So far, nothing, until Perry shouts, "There he is! I see him! Look!" We all run to him, looking down the steep hill.

"Right over there! I see him!"

He points to a bundle of leaves and branches. We spot a pair of black shoes amongst them and a pair of pale feet just a little further down.

None of us could breathe. Somewhere under those bushes was the rest of Ray Brower. The train had knocked Ray Brower out of his Keds just like it had knocked the life out of his body.

We all rush down for a better look, bracing ourselves for what we're about to see. Jesse, being the more courageous one, slowly removes the branch covering the body.

"Jesus," he breathes out.

What we saw had all of our hearts thumping against our rib cages. There, were the remains of Ray Brower.

His face was gray and his lips were blue. Dried blood covered his nose and he had a deep cut along his hairline. His face was full of bruises and his milky eyes stared straight up.

"Let's look for some long branches. We'll build him a stretcher," Jesse says. I move over to sit on a log just a few feet from the body. My mind immediately went to Karl.

I miss him so much.

The many times he's been mentioned for the pass few months is uncountable. There's not a day that goes by that he isn't. I'm known as Karl Thirlwall's kid brother, not Jason. I doubt some people even knew my first name.

He was the only one that gave a shit about me.

He encouraged me to write. I remember he'd come into my room and see me writing in the notebook he gave me. He'd tell me to let him read it the second I was finished.

He even came to our treehouse one night as I told a story that involved a room full of snakes and a character I modeled after Perry. I told a few stories like that; with the characters modeled after the people I care about the most in my life.

The last story I wrote, I wrote it in a different notebook and put it in his casket during his wake. But I saw Dad take it out and in that moment, I knew who he loved more.

Well, who he loved at all. I'm just the invisible boy, after all.

"Jason?" Jesse's voice sounds. "Why did you have to die?" I mumble to myself. "What's the matter with Jase?"

"Nothing, Pez. Why don't you guys go look for some long branches, okay?" They comply easily as Jesse takes a seat next to me.

"Why did he have to die, Jes? Why did Karl have to die? Why?" My tone an empty whisper, staring at the ground near the body with the body out of my direct sight. "I don't know," Jesse says.

"It should have been me."

"Don't say that."

"It should have been me," I feel my chest tighten with emotion. "Don't say that, man."

My eyes begin to well up as I spoke, "I'm no good. My dad said it, I'm no good."

"He doesn't know you," Jesse says, leading to see my face better, but I don't look at him. "He hates me," a single tear roll down my face and I made no attempt to wipe it away.