The Handcuff Effect

13

I woke up at about two thirty that night to my phone. I don't even know how I knew it was ringing, I always put in on silent when I went to sleep. I'd just pried my eyes open, and I saw the screen light illuminating the section of ceiling above it, the shade of my lamp and the glass of water beside it.

Awkwardly, I sat up, trying not to disturb Nathan, who was still sleeping uncomfortably on my floor, his arm hanging suspended in the air near the bed. Reaching across the expanse of my bed, I strained for my phone, my fingers grazing the glossy edge. Somehow, I gained enough traction to slide it onto my bed, where I could reach it. By that time, I had missed the call, and I saw my mother's number on the lock screen.

My heart slowed in my chest. In fact, everything seemed to have frozen in time. This was bad. This was really bad. I glanced back over at Nathan, but he seemed so far asleep there was no waking him, which came as a small relief. Unlocking my phone, I called mum. It barely rung once before she answered. 'Emma?' She whispered softly.

''Mum,' I exclaimed softly. 'What's wrong?' I felt my stomch tighten, bile rising in my throat. I fought to keep calm, for my mother's sake, if not my own.

I heard her erratic breathing on the other side of the line. 'He--he tried to--' She gasped out, disolving into a fit of sobs. I felt my body tense. 'He just left. I-I I had to--'

'Mum,' I soothed. Well, I tried to. I couldn't promise that the waves of fury rolling off me couldn't be felt in antartica. 'Where are you?'

'I'm i-i-in a hotel.' She stammered, hiccups and heaving gasps breaking her words up. I felt the first tinges of fear enter my system. She'd never been this shaken up before. It was beginning to make me more than a little nervous.

'I understand that,' I tried to tell her calmly. 'Where abouts is this hotel?'

I heard her swallow loudly. Her breathing left the reciever for a moment, and I assumed she was trying to collect herself. When she came back on, she already sounded much calmer. 'It's too afr out of town. I just needed to hear your voice.' I felt my body stiffen further. She sounded detached, clinical even. She didn't want me to know where she was.

'Mum,' I ground out. 'Tell me where you are. I'm coming to get you. You can't stay there--'

She interrupted me before I could finish. 'I can't let you near these people, Em. You have no idea what they'd--'

'Then make me understand!' I all but yelled. I no longer cared about waking Nathan up. Let him wake up. My mother was in danger, and she wouldn't tell me where she was.

'I can't, baby.' She whispered.

I felt my patience wear too thin. 'Then don't call back.' I snapped. 'Don't call me crying, expecting me to help you fix things if you won't let me do that.' I hung up before she could reply. About two seconds after that, an intense wave of guilt overcame me. I curled into a ball against the headboard, holding my head in my hands. I didn't even acknowledge how the hell that was possible until I registered the body heat next to me.

His arms surrounded me, comforted me. He didn't say anything, didn't ask what was wrong. Didn't offer verbal comfort. Just held me, His left arm somehow managing to encompass my knees as well. A watery chuckle slid out. 'Your arms are so long and lanky,' I murmured, 'It's making me feel ridiculously small.'

I felt Nathan nod beside me, his skull grazing mine. 'You are ridiculously small,' He noted. 'It's why I didn't peg you for a Goal Shooter.'

I snorted a little. 'No one calls it 'Goal Shooter', unless they're a preteen netballer,' I commented drily. 'GS or shooter is all.'

Nathan barked out a laugh, his arms tightening marginally around me. It was a strange feeling, having my crush not just hug me, but simply hold me, like I was worth holding to him. I relished in his attention, despite the gnawing feeling in my gut from my conversation with my mother. Finally, finally, Nathan Montgomery seemed to be noticing me.

And that made me giddier than the scent of his cologne near my face.

'I'd like to see you play,' He whispered softly after a moment. My heart thumped like a dead fish in my chest, and I had to bite down on the smile that was working its way onto my face.

Instead, I said, somewhat incredulously, 'You--really?'

I heard Nathan laugh, and felt the steady rumbled against my left shoulder and arm. 'Of course! I need to make sure you're being legit about this rep team business.'

Disappointment sang through me, and I fought as hard now to hide the slight slump in my shoulders as I had before to hide my giddy grin. 'You could just believe me, you know.' I offered darkly, but Nathan just chortled in response.

'What would be the fun in that?' He asked innocently, and I shoved into his chest with my shoulder. Nathan yelped a little, causing a smirk to spread over my face. 'Ow! That hurt! You have a bony shoulder!' He exclaimed, letting go of me with his left hand to rub his sternum.

I just shrugged. 'Runs in the family, I'm afraid.'

Nathan pondered that for a moment. 'That's a weird saying, don't you think?' I looked at him, brows disappearing into my hairline as I waited for him to elaborate. 'The "I'm afraid" thing. It doesn't make sense,' He contemplated. 'Like, what are you afraid of?'

I watched him for a moment, thinking over his reasoning. 'It's not so much fear,' I replied slowly, 'As regret. You know, "I regret to inform you your fish died" or something like that.'

Nathan shrugged. 'That's beside the point,' He argued. 'Since when has the word most commonly associated with fear become something to do with regret? I doesn't make sense.'

I shot a look at him, a bewildered smile tugging at my mouth. 'Do you want me to look it up for you?' I asked, incredulity leaking out.

Nathan scoffed. 'No. I was just saying that it is a weird concept.'

I raised my free hand a little in the universal sign for surrender. 'Calm down, tiger. No need to get all english teacher on me.'

Nathan eyed me carefully. 'I was not going all 'English Teacher' on you.' He stated definsively. I bit back a smirk, feeling like that would do nothing to help my case.

I raised a brow at him. 'Uh, yes, Nathan Montgomery, you were.'

Rather than argue, which I honestly thought he was going to do in order to protect his dignity, he leaned down off the side of the bed, his incredible balance glimpsing through as he checked his phone from halfway off the bed. 'It's late. Or early. Whichever way you look at it, its sleepy time.'

I refrained from commenting on the 'sleepy time' part of what he said. Well, I tried. I opened my mouth to say something, but he silenced me with a steely look, and I snapped my jaw shut with a clack.

I liked this youthful side of Nathan, I decided as he scrambled back onto his position on the floor, and we tried to find a spot that made us both comfortable. I liked that he still acted like a petulant child when we mock argued, but I also liked the way he thought. The way he saw things from an angle I hadn't looked at.

Honestly, he wasn't doing very much to drive me away, and I was scared that at some point, some point soon, he was going to realise that I definitely saw him as much more than a friend. So much, much more.