STAY | SOPE (소페)

i deserve it

i ended up in a park late at night
It was dark and i was hungry
but I knew i shouldnt eat or ill become fat

somebody came to me it was a man
"hey babyboy come here"
"noo please don- dont"
"beautiful ill fuck you good"

"STOP MESSING WITH MY BOYFRIEND PIECE OF SHIT!"
"what you gonna do about it shit"

The boy kicked the mans balls
and grabbed my hand and went running with me
we got to his apartment and he told me to sit down so I did

"Thank you"
"dont say thank you...silly me i did not say my name, the name is Jackson Wang"
"Jung Hoseok"

"well am gonna go make the food Hoseok, make yourself at home"
I cant eat i cant eat i cant eat i cant eat am fat am fat am fat

"mind joining?"
"su-sure"
i did not want to decline his offer since he saved me

"mind if I use your bathroom Jackson"
"sure use it"

I went fast to the bathroom
i couldnt take it anymore
i threw up

i grabbed an object that was in my pocket
i started cutting

why did he leave me!?
because your ugly

he deserves better
cut deeper

hes more fun than me
cut deeper i said

why cant i be pretty
deeper you deserve it

i am worthless
deeper

i cut deeper and deeper
this voice inside me controlled what i did

i throw the tool to the floor and my whole arm was a mess

"Hoseok are you ok?!"
"ye-yes ill come out in a second"

i cleaned myself out and put band aids on
lucky me i had a long sleeve shirt

"The food is ready Hoseok"
"Im not that hungry Jacksom"
"Hoseokie your so thin eat something for me"
"o- ok"

i sat down and felt disgusting by all this food in front of me
I havent eaten in 3 days
because of Yoongi I stopped
He always told me i was fat and i believe him. I am fat

I picked up the fork and got the food in it
i put it in my mouth and right when i did i got up so fast to the bathroom

"Hoseok-"
i closed the door and threw up
i flushed the toilet

"Hoseok i know your threw up"
"no i-"
"Hoseok please lets go to the hospitall"

___
end of storu