Apparently I wasn’t crazy after all. Leona and I had another session at school the day before I left. She made me draw the first thing that came to mind when I started. I drew a tree and a family sitting underneath. She mentioned the hands must’ve meant something but that I was more than okay. I had bumped into Alex again the day before I left San Antonio. He had given me an envelope with my name on it.
“It’s a letter from Austin. There’s an address in there if you ever want to send a reply back.”
I didn’t read it that day. I didn’t read it the day after. I don’t think I read it close to the time I first had it. After I got back to El Paso, Tori and Marcus dragged me out of my house so we could meet up with Julian. We spent the day out and right before the sun went down we arrived at the movies. We watch an action movie while messing around. I hadn’t had fun in a while.
Two weeks after that, I sat down with Alejandra in my bedroom while helping her with a project. Mom was at work and Tom was visiting his sister and nephew. He stayed with us for two nights making mom sleep better than usual. She woke up relaxed and calmed. No, I wasn’t thinking they did that. Mom would’ve told me. I felt like a mom.
“Calli?” I stopped cutting the paper to look at my sister. “Have you heard from Austin?”
“Yes. Uh, I bumped into one of his friends when we got to San Antonio. Then I bumped into him again before we left.” She sat up straight leaving her stuff by the side.
“What did he say?” I could see happiness lighting her eyes. I smiled at her as I put the scissors down.
“Well, Austin has been seeing a therapist. He’s back with his girlfriend,” Ale frowned making me chuckle. “but he hasn’t been working on music. They want him to get better.”
“Is his friend nice?” I nodded. She looked around my room before looking at me again. “Do you miss Austin?”
“Uh, yes. Do you?” She nodded. “Will you keep a secret?”
“I always do.” I chuckled and stood up.
I hesitated as I walked over to my closet. Sliding the door open, I grabbed the box I had always kept at the bottom since we moved. It contained the most important things I had. My first drawing, my first pencil, the many pictures with mom and Alejandra, my grandma’s necklace which I never wore and much other stuff. I walked over to my bed and sat down in front of Ale again before opening it.
“Austin’s friend gave me this the day before we left.” I grabbed the envelope from the box and showed it to Ale.
“Are you going to open it?” I nodded. She gave me a worried look as she shifted from her spot to sit next to me.
I took a deep breath and opened the envelope in my hands. Ale’s hand rested on my knee as a sign of comfort. I finally unfolded my paper and stared at it before reading it out loud.
Dear Calli,
It feels kind of weird writing to you. Alex told me he bumped into you at San Antonio and you asked for me. My mom says I shouldn’t be writing this to you because it won’t help me get better. I want to get better and be the person I was before. I convinced her to let me write this. She agreed after a few tries and I’m glad.
My mom now thinks I shouldn’t forget about that people that looked after me while I was missing. Along the clothes you let me borrow, I found a Polaroid picture of you and me. It has our names written on the back. I think that was you who wrote it. I made Alex get a copy of this picture for me to keep. The original should be inside the envelope along with this letter.
I really appreciate you, your mom and Ale for taking care of me. I still have that scar on my head so I’m wearing beanies to cover it up until my hair grows. As Alex told you, I’m back with Jessica. She begged for another chance so I thought about it and we’re trying. Well, I’m trying. To be honest, she doesn’t compare to you. She’s now with me because she wants to be noticed. You’re different Calli.
I felt like an idiot when I kissed you the first time. I shouldn’t have done that. I was confused but as I grew closer to you I think that changed. I can’t forget that image of you offering me your hand the first time you saw me. It made me feel safe and sound, like I was at home. I really miss that.
I hope everything goes well for both of us from now on. I’m trying to find myself but I promise I won’t forget you. I’ll do my best to not do that. I hope once I get better I can go back and find you. I miss the basement. I miss reading books. I miss playing chess with Ale. By the way, can you say hi to her when you read this? I miss Tori’s jokes and Marcus’ sports talks. I miss your mom’s cooking. I miss you Calli.
I hope to see all of you soon.
Until then,
Austin Mahone
“Wow.” I blinked a few times before turning to look at my sister. “Can you, can you leave my room for a while?”
“Sure. I’ll finish my project downstairs. Don’t worry about it.” She grabbed her stuff and kissed my cheek before heading out. I stared at the paper. There were two sentences that stood out from the rest.
I can’t get that image of you offering me your hand the first time you saw me. It made me feel safe and sound, like I was at home.
Did he really felt at home? Did he really feel safe with us? Was he really thinking of me? I heard a sniff and wiped my cheek. I was crying. Why was I crying? I should’ve been happy because Austin was trying to get in contact with me. I opened the envelope again to see the picture he wrote about. It was the two of us, smiling. I smiled to myself remembering the day we took it.
It was a school night and I didn’t feel like sleeping so I headed down to the basement. Austin was asleep but he kept tossing and turning until he woke up.
“What are you doing here?” I looked down at my feet in embarrassment before answering.
“I couldn’t sleep so I came down here.” He sat up with a goofy smile on his face.
“Want to talk?” I shrugged and sat down beside him. “What’s on your mind?”
“I don’t know. It feels weird talking about this with you.” He chuckled as he leant closer. He pressed his lips against my cheek making me look at him.
“I thought we could trust each other.” Another kiss. I sighed finally giving in.
“It’s kind of hard.” Austin placed his hand on my shoulder. I relaxed at his touch. He didn’t know it but still he made me feel calm. “Are we, like, still going to be friends after you leave?”
“Yeah. Why not? You’ve been helping me since you found me.” He wrapped his arm around my shoulders pulling me closer to his body. “I know it’s not going to be the same but you’ll always be my friend Calli.”
“Really?” He nodded.
“I found something in those old boxes. I think you might find it useful.” I raised an eyebrow obviously confused. He let go off me and stood up. I watched as he walked over to the amount of boxes that still remained in the basement. He looked so careless, like nothing bothered him. He rummaged through one of the boxes before he spoke again. “Here it is!”
“What is it?” He turned around holding whatever it was that got his attention. A Polaroid camera. “Are you for real?”
“I found it before going to sleep. It still works.” He smiled at me as he walked back to the air mattress mom had fixed for him to sleep. “Want to try it?”
“Sure! Sit down with me!” He handed me the camera before sitting down beside me. I stared at the camera before holding it in front of our faces. “Smile!”
Okay, I needed to get some help before Austin kept taking over my mind.
