The Dead Scout's Handbook of Afterlife Survival

Chapter Sixteen: Legends of Pirene

Crunching snow startled Cayden as Martha hobbled behind him, and he whirled around to realize he outpaced the rest of the group considerably. With a brief respite, they all caught up, shivering and grumbling.

"You gotta let us stay with you. We're struggling back here." A cough rattled Sarah's sentence, steam puffing over her porcelain complexion.

"My steed is foundering." Rebecca pouted from atop Charlie's shoulders as he clambered up the plateau. Now with the strength to keep it aloft, Rebecca's empty chair floated beside them, as if carrying a bored, office dwelling ghost.

"Sorry. I don't tire too easy."

"Clearly," was all Charlie could muster sans vomit. He dropped the vines from his waist, all of which encircled a massive log that almost seemed to shrug before deciding to tumble downhill. Sarah folded her arms and faced him.

"I'm not getting that..." Charlie groaned. "Practice time is over. I sweated so much.... when I dropped out of... Cayden's heat circle... all my clothes froze." Despite Charlie's grip relenting, Rebecca remained attached.

She squealed in horror and disgust upon discovering her clothes were fastened to Charlie. Cracking and squeaking ice shattered as Rebecca threw herself from Charlie's back and landed cleanly in her chair.

"Sorry, didn't mean to drop you. Here." Charlie crouched down to his feeble, shaking haunches to offer a ride.

With wide eyes, Rebecca stared at the chunk of his once tan and now yellow shirt that had broken and clung to her own clothing. "I'm staying here." Her words broke through a plastered expression fitting for such severe shell-shock.

"Okay. Tell me when you're tired, babe." Charlie had collapsed face down and his voice seeped into the exposed dirt under his nose.

"When I'm tired, we're stopping for the day. We already died. What's the hurry?"

Cayden couldn't agree more. There was a balance to strike in their journey. The cryptic lack of humanity rushed them, yet they needed to conserve enough energy to be able to fight if their concerns manifested into something tangible. Rushing might not provide any benefit at all, and may allow them to arrive at their first battle a touch greener and further exhausted.

About an hour passed while Charlie 'refocused his chi', a process involving deep meditation with repetitive mantras about painful calves and knees. The rest rejuvenated him and they marched again, with Cayden and Charlie to the front. Charlie attributed his newfound vigor to finding his empowering will to fight, stemming from two decades of repressing his aspirations underneath doubts and fear. He also wasn't tied to a log anymore.

Behind them, the ladies chatted and giggled. Beside Cayden, Charlie breathed heavily and turned to speak to him.

"Are you feeling any better about this place?" Charlie asked.

More than a few seconds passed, nearly to the point of rudeness when Cayden collected his answer and responded. "Yeah, a bit."

"Good, man, it's more fun with company. I'm glad you're here."

"Yeah. I'm glad you're here, too." After a moment of only light, whistling wind, Cayden coughed into his hands. He wondered if he had been this awkward at meaningful conversation before death. While he wanted to speak, he couldn't gain purchase on anything intelligent to say so Charlie spoke again.

"I know we were best friends but...do you think we were popular?"

"Um, no, probably not," Cayden answered flatly.

"Weird?"

"Bet so."

"Maybe weird is popular here."