Endless possibilities

Expectations

*buzzz buzzz* 

I turn off my alarm. I honestly didn't feel like getting up. I hated going to my job but there was nothing else I could do.. I didn't want to go to college because I couldn't really afford it. My parents hadn't gone to college either and mostly anyone I knew was also working. I sometimes wished my life could be a fairytale where I could have the life of a princess but that honestly wasn't the case.

My name is Lilanis, I lived with my parents and luckily didn't have any siblings. The closest thing to siblings was my new step cousin that I honestly was struggling to get along with me but that's a whole other story. It felt quite lonely not having any siblings to discuss my hardships with but oh well that's how life works I guess. Now back to me complaining about my horrible job again....

I rolled out of bed and hopped into the shower. If there's one thing I hated the most was to shower super early in the morning. To others showering in the morning meant their most energizing part of the day. For me it literally zapped the life out of my soul making me almost want to go back to bed. I get ready and rush to the kitchen to make myself a quick breakfast. Mom:" why are you always in a rush sit down and eat some breakfast." I grab a banana and tell her goodbye. It was honestly so annoying that I still had to live with my parents. One of the many disadvantages was my parents still treating me like a child. I was already 22 I didn't need to feel I had to be treated like a child full of structure. The only reason I couldn't really move out was because I couldn't afford it. 

Working at the coffee shop was a drag. It seems like this whole time I have been negative about everything but I feel that in the time I'm living in many days I seem them quite unsatisfactory. Compared to many people my age they are thriving and completing their dreams of finding their significant others or become millionaires. While compared to ordinary Lilanis it seemed like I was still in the same position. It may seem that I had the choice to live the way I am living but I was really going through a hard time. I had recently broken up with my boyfriend Alex all because he was cheating on me. Then for the cherry on top my godmother had divorced my godfather a couples month back. Now my godfather had a new family which included my step cousin. Which was very hard to handle because I considered myself very close to my godmother and now her disappearing from my life felt like she had died event though that wasn't the case. My step cousin was one of the brattiest people I have ever met and had a very high ego. I only interacted with her because my parents forced me to, but I wasn't pleased at all. 

Enough chit chat though it was time to get things ready to at the coffee shop. I had to get things tidy and ready because the manager wanted to talk to me. I started to clean the tables and removed the closed sign to the open sign. At times like this I wished I had the facility to go to school but my dad worked as a mail man and my mom didn't work because of her back problems. So the only sources of income were me and my dad. Just then my manager Randy walks in with a stranger. I was quite intrigued with the strangers presence. I almost felt captivated that even I felt confused. From the look of his eyes it was evitable not too stare back into hazel eyes. The stranger had a nice sense of style but I wondered why he would want to work at a coffee shop. Based on his looks it seemed he would be more suitable to work at the mall. Randy interrupted my thoughts. Randy: " hi Lilanis I wanted to introduce Tony he will be replacing me as your new manager. My wife is expecting our baby soon and I want to give her all the support she needs." Tony gives me a smile and extends his hand to shake my hand. Just great I thought to myself Randy wants to leave me alone with a complete stranger that I don't even feel he even belongs here how swell. I bet that Randy's wife is important I was glad for this new baby but why right now I had enough problems in my life...

While Randy was giving Tony a mini overview. I started to help the clients with their orders. I think the only thing that I enjoyed from my work was the smell of coffee brewing. It honestly helped me me relieve some stress,  but sometimes the customers were a pain. Like a lady had complained for not putting exactly three packets of sugar to her coffee. THREE PACKETS.!?!? Like there was bigger problems in society and she was only worried about three sugar packets not in her coffee. I zapped out of my thoughts when I heard my phone buzz. I had just gotten a text from my bratty step cousin Sophie.

Sophie: Hola primis let's go to the mall later. I need you to help me with picking some cute outfits for my date. 

Me: sorry I can't I have to work at the coffee shop late today.

Sophie: 😡 your coming with me you can't bail me like the other times. Tell your manager to leave early. 

I gave a pathetic eye roll if only she knew Randy was not my manager anymore. I honestly bailed on her the other times because I prefer to at least be surrounded by demanding people but not anyone like Sophie. It sucked that my godfather would treat her all princess like and giving her anything she wanted. Compared to me I had to work hard and still not get what I want. She had the princess life I sometimes envied. I snapped out of my thoughts when Tony tapped my shoulder. Tony: "shouldn't you be working Lilanis" me: " it's just a quick text either way business is kind of slow. Having my phone out has never bothered Randy." Tony: "fine but just this once." Randy then shows up to tell us he was leaving and was going to leave us so we would get acquainted. I had a bad feeling his expectations would be quite inaccurate. 

I think the only difference of the coffee shop was that it felt more quiet than usual. Quiet not as in the people coming in and out but my interaction with Tony. With Randy I would chit chat here and there but it felt weird not doing the same with Tony. Hours passed and it was time to close the coffee shop. I started to clean so I wouldn't be scolded by Tony again. Tony: " hey I want to apologize for scolding you earlier. I wanted to look tough in front of Randy. I'm sorry." I turned around a bit confused of what I was hearing. It amazed me he wanted to act tough but somehow was telling me that he isn't a tough guy. Now that's a first. Me: " don't worry I understand that what I did was a bit unprofessional so don't worry no hard feelings." Tony smiled at me. " good for now since you have more experience you can help guide me. " me: "umm sure. I have to apologize to for being so stiff today. I'm not very good when it comes to new situations." Tony: " don't worry tomorrow will be a new day. Why don't you go home and i will take care of the rest. " me: "are you sure? There is still a lot to clean?" Which honestly wasn't a lie. Tony: " I will be fine don't worry." I shrugged my shoulders. Me: "thank you see you tomorrow." I grab my stuff and head to my car. I guess I did have time after all to go to the mall with Sophie. 

 Me: hey Sophie guesss what meet you at the mall ok just got out of work early.

Sophie: yay we can have a lunch date.

Me: sure :) 

I wasn't too pleased with the idea. I drove to the mall and met up with Sophie. Sophie: "ahh primis see I knew you could make it see. You don't have to be so difficult at times you know," I honestly stay in silence and just tell her she was right because I didn't want to get her mad again. We stop by Aeropostale and she starts showing me different clothes. I kept nodding my head yes and no in order to avoid conversation with her. Sophie: "my date is so cute his name is Alex. Here's a picture of him." I honestly couldn't believe it was my same Alex and felt totally disgusted. Me: "you know he's a player right. He was dating me and decided to cheat on me. I don't think you should date him." Sophie gave me an eye roll. Sophie: "pfft you date somebody that's a first. All you do is spend time in that stupid coffee shop. I'd see why he would leave you. You aren't really the prettiest out of everyone." I literally stared at her in silence. I felt so hurt inside but I tried sucking it up. It got to the point I couldn't take it anymore. Me: "what are you trying to say!?!? I respected Alex I didn't cheat on him." Sophie: "relax primis it's just a stupid relationship it doesn't mean nothing. Stop being so serious. I said that you lack appearance because you never focus on yourself." That's when I couldn't take it anymore. I dropped her clothes and left. She didn't even bother chasing after me. Tears were rolling down my eyes. These were one of the many times I wanted to disappear. Looks didn't matter to me but what hurt me more was her making me feel I wasn't worth it. Which went hand in hand how I couldn't afford my other goals. That I wasn't worth achieving them. Because I had been so distracted I had accidentally bumped into someone. As soon as I saw who it was I literally wanted to die.