"friends" - a yoonmin ff ENG

brainstorming

Namjoon actually likes every idea I share with them and even brought some unfinished lyrics to lunch the other day. I gotta admit, even though he's a teacher, we make a pretty good team... plus, he was right. Seokjin's (or just Jin's) voice is really not that bad. I can work with that.

Our lunch breaks turn into brainstorming-sessions and Jimin always joins in. 
Since his breakdown and my panic attack, we hang out together a lot. He even started to hang out more with Tae and Kook during school hours again. He really seems to get better, even though he texts me from time to time when his anxiety kicks in once he's home alone. But those moments only last a couple of minutes until he's able to calm down. 

One thing is bugging me, though... With Tae and Kook he seems happy. With me he's... different. Cautious somehow.

On the one hand he becomes kinda shy when he's around me, and avoids my gaze. On the other hand he always searches for skinship and massages my neck or the palms of my hands when he feels like it.
We don't talk much, even though I have the feeling we got really close throughout the week. When we're together, there's not a single inch of space left in between our body's. He always searches for my approval, even if the topic totally bores me. It's almost like... I don't know... like... no, but that can't be right. 

He can't be into me. Never.

Fuck, why does this thought hurt so much? 

Tae says, I shouldn't worry about any of it. If there's anything on Jimin's mind, he'll eventually come around and talk to me about it. Well... eventually. 

Fuck, I really don't know what to do. I mean, what do you do in situations like that? I don't even know what we are and yet I wish we were more than just friends. But, no. No, that would only ruin everything, right? 

Aish! I gotta pull myself together and finish the track! 

Well, anyways: The brainstorming really helped. 

We did all the recording at my house, since the acoustics are somewhat better than at Namjoon's. Hobi even learned how to properly rap! I mean, he always had fun rapping along, but he never actually put much effort into it. Until now, that is. And let me tell ya: He's good. Really good. 

So yesterday I added the last set of arrangements and the rest of the vocals near the end. I didn't sleep much the last couple of days, but seriously? I just can't help it and I don't mind at all. Once I'm stuck on a song, I can't seem to let it go until it really lives up to my expectations. Maybe I'm gonna be a famous music producer one day... I'd only have to - no! Min Yoongi, focus!

Let's get to work, Yoongz - Jimin would probably say now.

Oh gosh, Jimin...