A series of stupid ideas and (mis)fortune, hosted by an Orange Guy

The day before the GRAND reopening!

A/N:
Aw shit, here we go again.
INCLUDING me being later than I wanted to be!
Just like in old times, aren't you getting nostalgic?!
This will be a super short chapter, just to get back into the flow!
God, it's been TWO YEARS.
TWO YEARS.
BUT I'M BACK.

Anyhow, timeskip to kinda give an excuse for the soft reboot of the series.

---

Old Sport GASPED, feeling dizzy.
For some reason he felt like he had been in some sort of coma.
Or maybe a time machine.
Fully disorientated he managed to stumble out of the weird pod he had been put in, and once more he was surrounded by shadowy figures who barked some ancient, cursed language at him.
"Würdest du deinen Augen glauben..."
"Wenn auf einmal zehn Million Glühwürmchen..."
"Die Welt erleuchten würden während ich einschlief?"
"... uh..." Old Sport looked at them, shaking, as they described the torture they would inflict on him. "... please. What do you want-"
But he stopped as he looked around the restaurant for an escape route- it had significantly increased in size.
It was fucking enormous!
"Christ, what did you guys do?! Was I- frozen?! How long was I out of commission?!"
None of them responded.
"... did I order this to happen?!"
However, while he was still lamenting, the pods beside his own opened and two more people came out of it, groaning.
Dave and Phone Guy looked miserable and Old Sport couldn't blame them.
"Wh-what the heck happened..."
"Fuck dude, what did ya do, Old Sport?!"
"I didn't do anything, I swear! You guys have to believe me! These weird cultist guys who keep threatening me-"
"Who?"
As they looked where Old Sport was pointing, nobody was there.
The manager groaned.
"You know what? Never mind. Can anyone remember what happened?!"
The bunny looked around. "Nope. But I can guess! Especially after the acid hurricane that tore apart Freddy's right after it was hit by lighting. The place is looking snazzy again, Old Sport!"
Still wonky on his legs, Phone Guy looked around too- but he kept quiet.
"Thanks Dave. Though I guess I gotta say- can't remember I ordered this."
"Ah, that's no big deal!" Cheerful Dave pointed out. "After all, maybe it was the factory giving ya a little bonus for your hard work. That isn't really out of the ordinary, y'know?"
A sense of... discomfort washed over Old Sport.
"But... what if I didn't want the expansion?"
Phone Guy finally spoke up again. "Uh- why wouldn't you?"
"I-" Breaking off, he turned away, looking around. "Where are the animatronics?!"
"Oh no."
With that all three of them began navigating the maze that the location seemed to be now.
Designated areas for different activities, little colored lines along the wall, claiming to lead anyone who follows them to the area noted on the little map attached to every other door.
It was a proper location now.
Honestly, a high class location, really.
... it wasn't what Old Sport had wanted.
This looked like something Henry would have made, once he had the chance- orderly, sterilized, deceptive.
... never mind that, the machines had to be located before something terrible happened to them.
And by them he meant literally anyone who was nearby said animatronics, actually.
Room after room after room after-
Finally, there was a note in the way back, mentioning a storage room.
Hopefully they were there.
The grey line led them to a rather claustrophobic, equally as grey room, that had a door leading into the ground.
"They gave us a BASEMENT?"
"No expense spared. Huh." Dave slightly frowned. "Alright, something's foul here. The animatronics were put somewhere, but I wasn't. The place was cleaned out and renewed without anyone asking for it. Whoever ordered this- is kinda weird, wouldn't you say?"
"Yeah..." Old Sport's eyes wandered down to the smallest slit, a thin opening between the hinges and the metal door itself. It seemed to be... flickering in there? "Do you really think they're down there?"
Everyone shortly held their breath-
Trying to listen, listen to the music coming from-
Abruptly something dropped from the ceiling, causing all three of them to let out a mortified noise.
"Who wants to know where they are?"
The smooth, white face of the puppet was dangling only a few inches in front of Old Sport's, leaving the man rather uncomfortable.
Its eyes flickered, the yellow color shortly washing from one color to another, only slightly, before becoming firmly yellow-orange again.
"Oh! Sir!"
The machine slinked down from up above, seeming like some unholy mixture of spider and snake-
Then it flipped over, finally being the right way around.
"Where have you been, sir?"
"Don't call me sir." Disgruntled Old Sport mumbled, still a little bit peeved about the scare.
"Understood."
"How long has it been? Are they okay?"
"It has been... INTERNAL CLOCK NEEDS RESCHEDULING. PLEASE PERFORM MAINTENANCE AT THE EARLIEST CONVENIENCE."
"Thanks Puppet, very cool."
"It's always a pleasure to be helpful to you, sir."
Rubbing his face, Old Sport glanced at the door behind the machine.
"... so why exactly are you here?"
"I am programmed to guard this place."
"That's- not what I meant. I wanted to know why you are out here and not in there with the other machines."
"I am programmed to guard this place."
"... okaaaay... not creepy at all." Uncomfortable Old Sport inspected the machine. "... ANYHOW. Can we get in?"
"Of course!"
Slipping back into the ceiling, the guardian of doors disappeared.
Finally, the way was clear!
Dave just stretched his arm out before Old Sport could decide if he was ready, grabbing the handle and shoving open the door in one elegant swoop.
Inside was a RAVE.
Candy Cadette was spinning like a Beyblade, rapidly blinking in rainbow colors.
Funtime Chica was blasting some cursed, speed up melody with the beats per minute akin to the heart of a mice that had been injected with heroin.
The frog was on the ground, dead.
Lefty was in the corner, vibrating at a concerning frequency.
Rockstar Freddy was bopping up and down.
Scrap Baby was reading a book.
And Spaghetti Freddy was in the middle of it all, SCREAMING "BiIIRRRrrRTHDAAaAAAAYYy" over and over and over and over and over and over and over and-
"W-WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?" Phone Guy called over the noise.
Everyone instantly shut up and turned to look at the people standing in the door.
The 'humans' stared at the animatronics.
The animatronics stared at the humans.
It was quiet.
Then finally, Candy Cadet spoke up.
"I am Candy Cadette. Come get your candy here! I have candy all day, every day. Candy. Candy. Candy. Can we leave this place now?"
Old Sport exchanged a glance with Dave, then nodded.
"... I think so, yes-"
But before he could continue, all the animatronics started screeching excited and rushed towards them, trampling Dave and Old Sport near death, with the only one spared being Phone Guy who had jumped to the side just in time.
Instantly, the main room was flooded, as they all seemed to know exactly where to go to cause the most damage.
The place with the most lights and electronics-
Phone Guy made the executive decision to leave his boss and the psycho bunny on the ground to try and prevent some damage to the establishment instead- after all, the other two surely would be fine.
"H-Hey, get off there- no, Lefty, please don't rip that off- FREDDY! THAT'S NOT HOW THOSE CURTAINS WERE SUPPOSED TO BE USED!"

As that was going on inside, outside a VERY important mission was taking place.
Three children.
One ODDLY secure building.
Rope- and not really much else.
At least the ropes had something metallic at the end.
They had huddled together below a window that they had peeked through a second ago, looking at each other serious.
Mary, the de facto leader of the operation started.
"We haven't heard from then in FOREVER! And the place is STILL empty. You know what that means!"
Oliver seemed much less pleased. "... no?"
"THEY WERE! KIDNAPPED! AND WE MUST GO AND SAVE THEM!"
"GodDAMMIT Mary! That's NOT likely. Also, if they ACTUALLY were, then bad people would have done it, who probably would kidnap us too!"
"IT'S EXCITING, RIGHT?!"
"MARY!"
Isaac, who was staring up to the roof, slimmed his eyes.
"... Mary is right, Oliver. We have to at least try. They're our friends, right?"
"NO. NOT MINE. I'M NOT FRIENDS WITH CREEPY WEIRDOS."
Isaac quietly snorted. "... lucky for you me and Mary aren't like that-"
"What did you say?"
"Nothing!" Handing his friend the heavy end of the rope, Isaac smiled a little. "Try to throw it on the roof!"
"No way! We're NOT breaking in! Can't we do funny forbidden stuff like putting something in a bag and putting the bag on fire in front of someone's door and then ring and run off-"
"Oh shut up!" Mary wasn't having it, snatching the metal end and aiming. "I'll do it!"
Elegantly the end shot forward-
- and with a crash right through the window.
"Oops..."
"Mary!" Oliver cried out, upset. "Great, now if someone is here, they KNOW we're here! You can't throw that far anyways, why did you-"
Interrupted by a surprised scream her brother stopped just long enough to see as Mary was sucked in through the window, as the rope was pulled, Isaac grabbing on in the half second reaction time he had, being dragged in too-
"MARY, NO-"
Not only was the brown-haired boy now alone out in the cold, but he had no way to follow-
The entire ledge of the window was covered with shards...
From inside Mary's cry sounded.
"LET ME GO!"
Oliver pressed his teeth together, and abruptly reached up to the ledge, glass digging into his fingers, but he simply kept biting down, the taste and smell of blood reaching his brain almost instantly-
And yet he didn't stop, dragging upwards, even as every inch of his hands screamed out.
All it took was one really good drag, then he was halfway over and-
Fell down and inside.
Coming to his feet quickly, pushing himself up backwards on the wall, his eyes managed to focus in time to see Mary kicking and boxing in the air, as the black bear was holding her up by the scruff.
His eye however were focused on Oliver right now-
Who came to his feet.
"LET HER GO!" His voice cracked, but he didn't care. "I- I GIVE YOU ONE CHANCE!"
Isaac, who had finally managed to get up too, struggling far more from the abrupt grip, leaned against the wall, catching his breath. "I-it's okay Oliver, he's- Lefty- he wouldn't-"
Before that could be discussed though, a hysterical, mechanical voice was audible.
"OOOOOOooOOoOOH- CH- CHILDREEEEEeEEEEEN!"
From the ceiling SOMETHING dropped, and the boy knew what it was, but his brain couldn't fathom it at the second, all he could do was staring at the flickering, moving mess of cables and eyes that slowly build up in front of him-
Before an abrupt flashing of electricity broke his mind free.
The phone-headed man stood there, out of breath from the sprint across the hall, a taser in his hand.
"G-GET AWAY FROM THE CHILDREN."
The noodlebear hissed and screamed at the same time, a terrible noise that brought the image of a thousand mouths-
And then it disappeared upwards and into a vent.
Oliver wanted to cry.
This had been a bit much.
Sure, he could handle a lot- monster bears, creepy clowns, flamethrowers- all of that was cool.
But he thought about Mary getting hurt.
HE had gotten hurt...
Phone Guy moved over, leaning down to him, but making no move to touch him.
"A-are you okay, kid? Uhm- do you- can I- you need to come with me to the- we have an infirmary- it's all new and clean and w-we need to patch you up."
It was somehow funny.
This tone- the boy understood it fully, it was just the panicked tone he had taken on when he had been too rough with Mary and she was crying.
Don't tell mom.
... for adults it's- 'please don't sue', right?
However, that didn't really matter to Oliver, he simply nodded and let the man lead him away, mainly because he really didn't want the other two to see him like this.
It was fine.
The Orange Guy had finally entered the room, looking beaten up, but- more than capable to keep his friends save anyways, right?
They passed each other, Old Sport being left to be rather confused as to how the kids entered and why the HELL one of them was bleeding.
Surrounded by animatronics who were all up to no good, he just remembered how bad things could get in a real hurry.
Dave, who dragged himself in behind him, looked up and around-
However, he was utterly delighted at the sight of the kids.
"Heyaaaa!"
"Hello Mr. Bunnyman!" Mary waved, having been put down and dusted herself off.
"Hello, sir." Isaac nodded too, finally catching his breath for good.
They quickly joined the adult's side, maybe a little bit intimidated by the fact that machines were now in the majority for once.
Mary looked up at the owner of the location, a little bit peeved.
"Why didn't you tell us you were renovating!?"
"Don't you like what we did with the place?"
"I... do, but that's not the point! We were worried sick when the place closed down and- hey!"
She was interrupted as her hair was getting ruffled by Old sport.
"Look at you, getting all upset! Me and Dave, we wouldn't just disappear, don't worry. Right Dave?"
Happily the bunny perked up, his ears bouncing. "Hell yeah! We always come back! Even if we get put into a freeze-sleep for a few centuries."
"... I don't think that will... happen." At least the Orange Guy HOPED.
Both of the kids looked at each other, skeptically.
"So... why... was this place renovated?" Isaac asked.
"Good question."
"Good question."
"Good question."
All of the humans said, before looking at each other.
Isaac looked a little bit irritated.
"Okay, uhm- so. Who... ordered this?"
"No idea." Old Sport shrugged.
"But- isn't- isn't there- I don't know... a paper trail? Emails? Anything?"
"OH!"
Abruptly Old Sport turned, causing everyone to jump.
"I could check my emails, yeah!"
Rushing off, he got to the office first, his little parade of confused people- and some animatronics- on his tail, coming in right after, piling up more and more until the exit was fully closed off.
Dramatically Old Sport pressed the ON button.
Nothing.
MORE DRAMATICALLY he pressed the ON button even MORE-
Nothing.
"Oh, come on." He proceeded to press on it multiple times, which ruined the moment, but did the trick, the screen flared up.
As he opened up his email, he scrolled past a million MILF FOXY'S IN YOUR AREA!!! Emails, before getting to an email with the sender "Factory".

'Greetings.

Seeing your successes with the location entrusted to you, we have deemed it fit to reward your year of hard work with an expansion. This should also go along quite nicely with your enhanced roster of animatronics that inhabit your location.
(Please note: taking in animatronics without notifying the factory is a violation of contract. If this happens again, we will be forced to take action.)

I can see you have genuine intents. I respect that. But all animatronics need space and appropriate amounts of attention on them.
The next upgrades must be requested by you, this was a gesture of good will from my side. Remember to treat this franchise well, or we will have to take action.

With kind regards,

Mrs. Miller.'

For a few minutes everyone was quiet.
Then Old Sport slapped the screen down as though it was a laptop, not a computer.
The sound of crushing glass didn't see to phase him.
"I am terrified."
"... Old Sport- yeah. That."
Dave seemed to really lose his mind, but he kept his mouth shut, just staring at where the signature had been a moment ago.
Isaac and Mary didn't really seem to quite get it, however, sensing the people's distress around them, they were silent, staring at where the screen had been as well.
Funtime Freddy however didn't care at all.
"A-AND?! We-eeeE G-GOT a bigger PL-PLACE! That's g-GOOD, right!? B-bigger places me-mean..." He took a deep breath and everyone threw themselves under the table, covering their ears with their hands as the living noodle threw his head back and began screaming at the volume of a starting plane. "BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER PAAAAAaaAAAaAAaaAAAAAAAaaaAAAAAAARTIIIIIIIIIIIiiIIiIIIIIIiIIiIiIIiIIIIiIIIiIIES-"
Rubble came crashing down from the ceiling.
The bear was alone.
"WwwWW... wWhereE did e-everyone GO?"
He disappeared to search for them, leaving everyone else to sigh in relief.
Coming crawling back out, each of them tried to get the ringing out of their ears before speaking again.
"O-okay... wh-what is going to happen now?"
Poor Isaac sounded a little bit miserable.
Mary seemed to handle it a little bit better. "Are you going to open again finally?!"
For a moment longer, Old Sport cleaned out the brain that had been liquified in his ears.
"... of course..." There was nothing they could do about the factory for now anyways. That would come up when it came up. But- what they did want to do, he remembered- "... we have a party to plan."
"What?!"
Everyone looked up at him, Dave's eyes even bigger than the other two's.
"Yes! The bear. The bear gets a party." Staring RIGHT into Dave's eyes, he stressed his words. "You know. The bear with the... desire. For the party. To move on. From not having had a party."
"OH RIGHT. Yeah, sure Old Sport. Though I dunno if he can behave well enough to get... the party."
"What are you two talking about?" Mary frowned, not liking the feeling of missing something.
"Nothing!"
Both of them agreed on that.
Smoothly distracting from that, Old Sport started a sentence, simultaneously thinking more and more about it.
"Hey, actually, would you two like to help to plan the party?" He stopped abruptly, his eyes flashing a little. "... yes, we really would need you to help us. After all, what's a party without guests...? Wouldn't it be fun to have a private party with Freddy's?"
Dave somewhat frowned, but stayed quiet, while the kids looked at each other, excited.
"We get to plan it and go!?"
"Yes!" Happily Old Sport confirmed. "But- remember, it's Fraghetties party, not specifically for you. If you come, you WILL have to try and help him have a good time."
That damped the mood a little- but they both ended up nodding at each other.
"Okay, that's- fair. I think."
"We can do that."
"Fantastic!" Sensing that Dave was about to say something, the Orange Guy spoke up loudly. "I appreciate it!"
The kids rushed out, trying to find the third in the group, to talk him into absolute submission.
No way he'd be actually willing to partake in a party for the murder bear-
Thankfully democracy was a farce and a neat tool to force the sensible into compliance!
Or something like that.

Dave stayed back a little, grabbing Old Sport by the wrist, dragging him in, just a hint too close.
"... ya know, Old Sport... that's a dangerous thing you ask of them."
Somewhat the smaller guy struggled, then gave up and accepted he was not getting away.
"It's not that bad. We're going to be there too, right?"
"Y'know that ain't enough. Not by a long-shot."
"The Marionettes will be there."
"Somethin' always goes wrong. Why even risk it?"
For a second both of them stared at each other.
It was deafly silent.
Nothing.
No words were exchanged.
They simply stared at each other.
... finally Dave retracted his hand, letting Old Sport go.
He watched on as the man disappeared into the chaos of machines and people.

----

A/N:
Urgh, I've reached maximum W H E L M
No more overwhelm, just. MAXIMUM.
Might be wrapped up for another month or two, because lots of work is currently coming for me.
But I do feel like this chapter nicely straightened up the current open plotthreats...
Though, may I add, I also always welcome plotideas, including ships and all that?
Because I do, even if I don't take up what you say, or it's not very realistic for it to happen, it gets my brain working! So yeah don't be shy about sharing your own thoughts!