Jaded

[44] What Matters Most

"What the hell are you talking about?" Atty asks.

Despite the fact that Jay shoved him like he was a Bobo doll, Atty remains unfazed. Or he's trying to, at least. His expression may appear neutral but I can see his jaw tightening the longer Jay glares at him.

Unfortunately, Jay doesn't show any signs of stopping. He just steps back and pulls in a deep breath. Even though he takes a moment to steady himself, when he speaks, his words are marred by the cracks in his voice. "Forget it, you won't care anyways."

I have no idea what's happening. Just a few minutes ago my biggest concern was getting Atty to eat the hairy kiwi. Now, everything's blown up and I have no idea how or why.

Clearly, Atty doesn't either because he runs a hand through his hair, eyebrows furrowed. "Don't be stupid, of course I'll care. What's going on?"

"Leo broke up with me. He visited an hour ago, said what he said, and... and just left, right before you pulled up. I don't even know how you found out..." Jay's eyes flit over to me as he trails off.

Uh oh.

Before I can defend myself, Atty folds his arms and frowns. "Don't blame her, she wouldn't tell me no matter how much I asked. I figured it out myself."

I want to fix this but I don't even know where to begin.

Jay turns towards the house just as a tear rolls down his cheek. He makes his way over to the entrance and sits on the front steps, almost collapsing as a resigned sigh escapes his lips.

With his head hanging down like that, it's impossible to understand what he's mumbling. But when Atty asks him to repeat himself, Jay whips his head up, enraged.

"I said, this is why I didn't tell you! You think you always know what's best. You get yourself involved and fuck everything up!"

"That's not fair," I say. "Atty's just look-"

"Stay out of this Jade, I mean it," Jay growls, keeping his glare zeroed on Atty.

Atty just sighs. He places a hand on my upper back and gives it a reassuring pat, flashing me a tiny smile before closing the distance between Jay and him.

He stops just a few paces across from Jay, on the grass. In the softest voice I've ever heard, he says, "I did not meddle this time."

Jay shakes his head and tucks it between his knees. Under the moonlight, with the slight hum of crickets beginning to fill the air, his words are barely audible. "Bullshit. The things Leo said... it sounded like they were coming straight out of your mouth. There's no way you didn't push him to this, I know you."

"And what're the things Leo said?"

I feel terrible for Jay, and I want him to work this out with Atty, but I have a sinking feeling about this. That things are about to go very, very, wrong. I want to put a stop to this but my feet feel like they're glued to the asphalt.

My throat feels so dry. I need to tell Atty to handle this delicately, not to be as blunt as he usually is. But I can't talk.

Jay rests his chin against his knuckles and clicks his tongue. "He said that I'm too young. That us being together at this point in time isn't okay. That even if he likes me, he shouldn't be with me right now."

Be nice Atty. Tread carefully.

Atty pauses for a moment, then says, "Leo's right."

Game over. 

I wish I could move, speak, do something. My hands are shaking and I can't tell if it's because of shock or fear.

Jay laughs, the snipped icy kind of laugh that feels like a dagger ricocheting around my rib cage. "Of course you think he's right. If you didn't, then you wouldn't have pushed him to this, would you?"