Stars//JJ Maybank One Shots

Lonely (drabble)

Not really a warning but negative self-talk, mentions of bullying, loneliness (duh)

(A/N I've been neglecting this book and I wish I could promise that I'd write more but I don't know if I can with the semester starting again. Also this little one shot is purely self-indulgent because I'm sad so here you go)

When you tell someone you grew up on an island in the Outer Banks they automatically assume that you've lived some sort of crazy life. They assume teens spend their days at the beach, partying, you know, teenager stuff. And sure that might be true for the pogues and the kooks but what if you didn't fit into either group.

Technically you're a pogue if you're talking about financial status. Your family owned a touristy store on the main strip but tourist season is only a couple months out of the year. The rest of the time, your dad went on fishing trips just to keep your family afloat. You grew up here, you'd known pretty much everyone since you all started school together on the cut.

But that didn't automatically give you friends. Sure, you talked to people in class but you didn't have a best friend, you didn't hang out with anyone. You were alone. And the one time you had made close friends, they eventually decided that they didn't want to be around you anymore and decided to bully you and spread rumors. Those rumors essentially ruined any chance you had at making friends. It's a very small island, word travels fast.

So imagine your surprise when the infamous 'ladies man' that you'd hopelessly been crushing on for years, sat down next to you in your usual spot on the beach. You both sat in awkward silence before you decided to ask what was really on your mind,

"JJ why are you here?"

"Well I see you sitting here, everyday, by yourself and I don't know I thought maybe you wanted some company" JJ shrugged and went back to playing with the sand in front of him

"So why now?" You asked

"Why not?" JJ retorted

"Because you have friends to go hang out with" You muttered slightly bitter

"And you don't?" JJ said with an unreadable look on his face

"JJ, we've gone to school together since kindergarten. I think you know by now that I don't have friends" you sighed frustrated

"Why?" JJ said

"You know why" you rolled your eyes

"Actually I don't have any idea. From what I know I think you'd be a great friend" JJ shrugged and played dumb

"Okay, you know what? I'm done having this conversation. See you never" you stood up and went to walk away when JJ placed a hand on your wrist

"Don't go. I wanna get to know you better. My friends are around the bend if you want to come hang with us"

"I don't understand you JJ" you shook your head

"What do you mean?" JJ furrowed his eyebrows

"Why are you doing this? You know my reputation, and like I said we've gone to school together all of our lives. So why are you just now deciding you want to get to know me?  Huh? Did one of your friends make a bet to see how long it took you to screw the quiet girl? Well I guess you lost the bet then" You ranted before speed walking away, missing the confused but upset look on JJ's face.

JJ didn't understand why you were so upset and where any of that came from. He always thought you were so nice and yeah some horrible girls said some really hurtful stuff about you but no one believes that stuff right? At least he didn't. He was beginning to wonder if he could ever show you that he's been secretly crushing on you for as long as he can remember. Sure, he has fun screwing tourons but he'd give it all up in a second to be with you. That's how highly he thought of you and it made him sad that you seemingly didn't feel the same about yourself.

As you walked home you thought back to the whole ordeal and you felt bad. You didn't mean to go off on JJ. He had never done anything mean to you and he was literally inviting you to come hang out with him and his friends. It's everything you wished for but your walls are built too high to notice it. You were so damaged by the actions of your past friends, you didn't believe that you deserved to have people who liked you and wanted to be around you. So you'd suffer alone, rather than take the chance of getting hurt again.

a/n
So in conclusion I'm sad and have no friends
xo
Haley