Warmth

▪ 4 ▪

If Phoebe had asked me when or why I had fallen for Nathan Lee Frazier, it would be a hard question to answer.

There was something ethereal about his voice. When I first heard him speak in chemistry class, his deep voice resonated through the silent room and my direction of attention changed instantly. I couldn't quite describe how he looked at first because his voice threw me into a trance. It was the type of voice that made heads turn. Strong and confident, not even a hint of hesitation.

He was like the sun to me.

It was not like I had a meek persona that pulled me towards his confident one. I developed this detached personality of mine because according to my close ones, whenever I open my mouth people only get hurt. So, I ended up talking less and less among strangers. In a way it made me observe people more without them caring. 

I was quite average looking in my opinion if not a bit on the weird side. I was a bit too tall than my peers and my fashion sense made me stick out like a sore thumb. I was, more or less,  like a scrawny scarecrow in the middle of a sea of mannequins. 

My peripheral vision sensed that he turned his head towards me and looked at me for about 2 or 4 seconds which was longer than the glances he spared at the other girls in the room.

I didn't care if it was my awkward personality or my accent or my grunge style that made him turn his head towards me.

I didn't give a damn.

I didn't care why he looked at me as long as he looked at me.

Phoebe made fun of me sometimes about how I was so smitten with him even without talking to him once in the class.

I never met his eyes. I was scared. But at the same time, I wished he'd catch me staring at least once. That way at least he'd have known that I looked at him too.

_

I had the chance to see Sasha Kendricks up front when one day she stood in front of my desk and asked me for my notes.

And her dark eyes swallowed me to the whole instantly. They were as deep and mysterious as the ocean, only they were dark brown- almost close to black, instead of blue. They say the deepest part of the ocean is black, not blue.

She smiled very little, almost never. Her voice was monotonous and nonchalant most of the time with a slight accent. She always wore dark and tomboyish. I was curious about her. Though not curious enough to approach her.

I felt like an absolute idiot every time I stole side glances at her. She never once noticed me. Not to brag or anything, but I'm not exactly an unnoticeable person in class. Even I knew I asked too many questions. But what irked me was that she never once looked at my way.

I didn't understand why I was irked either. It wasn't like I fancied her. To put it bluntly, she was not my type. She was dark and wild, mysterious and unpredictable; something like a warning 'stay away' sign in front of a haunted castle.

Deep inside something told me that I shouldn't get involved with a girl like her. Not even in my wildest imagination did I see myself with a girl like her. She was not the type of girl I'd even have a fling with, let alone a relationship.

She wouldn't be good for me and my future that I planned out in front of me perfectly.

Then why was I letting her presence get into me so much?

_

Word count: 619