Stars

8

In the car, Allen and I were quiet for a little while. I think we were both just confused last night but I'm the reason for it. I just can't help myself around Allen. No man has ever made me feel the things he has. I loved Charles but Allen and I have a connection that is very rare. That's why I'm so afraid of whatever might happen between us. He looks over at me as he's driving and notices i'm thinking.

"What's on your mind sunshine?" He says giggling.

"Shut the fuck up." I reply with a soft chuckle.

"Okay, I'll speak then. I enjoyed last night. But I think for your sake and my own, I'd like it if we didn't do it again," he states. 

My eyes widen.

"Why?"

"I don't mind meaningless sex but with you..." he trails off and his face turns pink. I start to squirm wondering what he's going to say.

"... with you ... it's not meaningless. I can't even convince myself to think of it as 'just sex'" he continues. 

I try to hide my red face. I felt the same way, that's why I was always afraid to do it with him again. I know I would just get hurt. Allen has never been in an actual relationship he always sleeps around with people. I didn't think I would be different. Was he trying to say that I'm the first person he's ever felt this way towards? Except well... James. 

Ugh.
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We arrive at school and walk to our first period this time because it's a B day and our first class is together on B days. After he said that in the car I just nodded my head and smiled because I had so many butterflies in my stomach and so many thoughts that I didn't have anything to say. Allen brings his arm around me.

"Celeste, we're good, right? Like this is what you wanted, too?" he asks looks down into my eyes.

"Yea, on the same page," I gulped. 

He tossed my hair around and made it super messy. I scoffed and we both laugh. As we're walking down the hall a really tall and slender girl walks towards us.

"Hi! Allen, Celeste. I'm having a party tomorrow on Friday if you guys want to come," she says. 

Pearl was such a beauty. She was about 5'11. Her skin had no imperfections, it looked like glass. She had these twinkling blue eyes and small nose with a decent sized bottom lip. Her hair was always tied back into a loose low ponytail and had a few blonde strands hanging out. I envied her. She was also a friend of Charles.

"Yea! It's good to hear from you, Pearl." Allen answered. I smiled in agreement.

"Great! I'll text you guys my address! I've missed being around." Pearl replies and walks off. 

Pearl was a sweet heart. Her and I only hung out a hand full of times in groups when I was with Charles. When he died, she was sad about it. Even though we weren't close she came by my house everyday around 4 and would bring food or coffee and we would sit in my room and talk about Charles or do something to get our minds off of him. She was one of the people that forced me out of bed that night on the town. When the next school year came around we kind of fizzled out but we would catch up with each other once in a while. 

Although we haven't talked in months, Pearl has a special place in my heart.

"Can't wait to mingle on Friday!" Allen says excited as Pearl walks away. We both laugh and walk to class.