Call Me Babe

Chapter 4

Dear Abi,

I know it’s been a while since I’ve written you back, but I’m sure you’ll forgive me once you read this one. I swear to God, Abi, you can’t tell ANYONE what you’re about to read. If you were here, I’d make you pinky swear like we did when we were little kids. *holds out pinky to you* You swear my secret’s safe with you? I’m not joking, this is the most embarrassing story I’ve ever told in my whole life. 

Okay, so you know Senior Prom? I know we always said it was lame and we’d never go. But I’ve been hanging out with some of the popular girls this year, and they asked me to go with them and I couldn’t refuse. I guess one of them had snuck in a water bottle filled with vodka, and I took a few sips like everyone else did. I know I should’ve said no, but it was a moment of weakness and I said yes. That shit’s stronger than I was expecting. 

I know I really talked shit about him in my previous letters, but Joe showed up. He’d grown his hair out since he stopped following me around, and it’s all swoopy and nice now. This is probably really cheesy, but the only word that came to mind when I saw him walk in was gorgeous. I’m not sure where he got it, but he had definitely been drinking some too. I guess it must have been the alcohol, but this time he actually came up to me and carried on a full conversation. It turns out he’s quite charming and funny when he has the courage to speak. 

After we had danced together for a while, he grabbed my hand and dragged me outside. It was late, and the moon was out, and we were alone, and he leaned in. It was my first kiss, and my god, it was flawless. I mean, really something. It took my breath away, and if it were a drug, I think I’d be using it for the rest of my life. I can’t believe you never told me it was that wonderful!

I wish I could tell you that’s where the story ends...and it’s at least where my memory of the night kinda ends. There’s a small, vague recollection of getting in his car with him, a brief glimpse of pulling over to the side of the road and sharing another one of those magical kisses, and eventually pulling up to his house and heading inside. I guess his family was out of town for some emergency, and we might have taken advantage of the house being empty. 

The next morning, I woke up to him stroking my cheek like we were in love, and then I had a hard time finding my underwear. I tried to make it as painless as possible, but he kept looking at me like he was some lovesick puppy. He agreed to drive me back to my car, but barely talked the whole way there. It was like he couldn’t talk to me  or look me in the eye without the alcohol in his system, but he somehow managed to string enough words together to get out something that resembled him asking me out on a date. I had to say no. I mean, I don’t even like him, and I’m moving to LA for college soon. Besides, what would we even talk about? I don’t even think he *could* talk to me, Anyway, I wish I hadn’t looked back. He was staring at me like I’d broken his heart, and I can’t say I even blame him. What kind of jerk lets him get that far if they’re not even interested in him?!?

ABI! I can’t believe that’s my story. A first kiss and losing my virginity on prom night to some not-so-awkward-anymore guy who I’ve barely even had 2 conversations with. I think I’m a walking cliche now. I’m so damn glad they had to push it back until school was over, because I can’t imagine walking back into that school and needing to tell the girls where I ran off to. 

I swear to god, Abi. You can’t tell anyone. Never ever ever. I will never live this one down. You better come up with something to say that will make me feel better, because I’m still mortified about it. 

Your forever embarrassed best friend, Taylor