cloudy with a Chance of freedom

chapter 14

Yes, the Harem Rant came out of nowhere, but there was a reason for it. The only OFFICIAL pairing as of yet in this story is Fon/Viper (Camellia). Skull almost got trapped in a harem the last time, until he thought over the logistics of it and decided "HELL NO". I don't have a problem with harem fics, I just think they're too much trouble to write.

Skull got up with the usual protest. He hated mornings. Fortunately there was something on his table that made up for his least favorite part of the day.

A fresh, proper cup of Italian coffee with just the right amount of sugar. Blaise had a similar cup with a bit of milk fresh from a farm on his table.

Blaise took one look at the coffee, then at a yawning Skull.

"Where did this come from?"

"My new house elf. Consider it an apology in advance for half the crap I'm likely to put you through for the next six years."

"Just to be clear, you're bribing me with coffee."

"Proper Italian coffee straight from Italy."

"...How the hell did you get the elves here to deliver proper coffee? More importantly since when do they know how to make it?"

"They don't, and it's actually being made by the elves from your estate since they know how we prefer to drink it in the mornings. It's just being delivered by a third party who is allowed through a loophole in the school rules and tolerated by the other elves. It's not like anyone actually knows the names of every elf in the castle after all."

"I'll bite. How did you get your personal elf past the wards?" asked Nott.

"Because his current assignment is to help maintain the creatures in my case, and thus is part of an ongoing research project for my future career as a professional Mythozoologist," said Skull without missing a beat. "Since I can't exactly carry the case with me to class, Snape gave me permission to hire an elf to help maintain the animals since their condition directly affects my grades. Officially he's not considered a 'personal elf'."

"And unofficially?" asked Nott smirking.

"I may or may not have a fan who's more than happy to do small things for me so long as I'm very discreet about it?" grinned Skull.

Nott cackled.

"You're a true Slytherin, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise Black."

Only a Slytherin would find a legal loophole that not even the old cat or the headmaster could revoke, since it was part of his education. It was a law so old that not even Dumbledore could get around it, as quite a few of the pure bloods used to get the jobs they wanted... it wasn't like Pomphrey could devote much time to giving basic healer's training to every student that wanted it.

Or in my case, to a student stuck in a bed because of an overprotective witch who saw far too much of me already... thought Skull.

When he had been a student last time, he had spent far too much time in the hospital wing. So much so that Pomphrey had literally assigned him a bed, complete with plaque.

In order to keep him from trying to get out of her tender mercies, she had given him several books on basic healing charms and quizzed him during the slow times. Then when he had polished off those (fourth year), she started putting him through the advanced lessons which included him practicing on an odd orb that registered if the charm was cast correctly. There were also a few lessons on the proper way to mix potions without bad side effects and adjusting them for unforeseen problems.

Case in point, the amount of basilisk venom in his blood combined with undiluted phoenix tears. Certain potions would react badly to the venom or be rendered useless by it.