Tony Stark Oneshots

Tony's Real Age

They had just gotten back from a mission in Wisconsin, and were debriefing when Clint brought up a problem he had with fighting one of the villains...

"It was unethical!"

Natasha, who was sharpening her knife, rolled her eyes, "we did what we had to, it's part of battle"

Clint threw his hands up in frustration, this fight had been going on for the past fifteen minutes, and no one was listening to him, "We cant just go about beating up children, Natasha!"

"He was twenty-three, birdbrain, no where on this planet is that considered a child" Tony finally spoke up, having been silent up until now, observing the fight

But he had better things to do, things to work on, so he tried to put an end to the banter

Clint did not back down though, turning to face Tony, frustration shining through the greenish-blue eyes of the archer,

"he was so young an-"

"so?" Tony cut him off, "young or not, he burnt down Maddison, Clint. You cant just burn down the capital of Wisconsin and expect to get off scotch-free"

"He was young enough to be my son!"

"Technically, so am I. your point is..?"

Clint's glare turned slightly more confused, "Tony, how old do you think I am? You better not be calling me old on I swear..."

he let the threat hang for a moment, but failing to get a reaction out of Tony,

"I dont know", Tony responded, thinking over the question for a few seconds, "Forty five, maybe forty six? assuming you're older than you look"

Tony watched as Clint blinked  few times, pulling his eyebrows together, "Forty five, yeah... how old are you then?"

Steve, who was pinching the bridge of his nose, no doubt to ease the oncoming headache, groaned annoyedly, "Come on guys, now's really not the time to start fights on age. Tony, It's not nice to call someone old, especially if they're-"

"twenty-four", Tony cut in, pointedly ignoring Cap's lecture, "So what's that you had to say about the guy earlier being too young to beat up? because if that's true, then you sure have a lot of apologizing to do"

He meant it as a joke, but when he got no reaction, not even from bruce, he looked up to see everyone stopping what they were doing to stare at him

Tony, beginning to grow uneasy under the scrutinizing eyes of his team, let out a breathy laugh, "is there something on my face?"

Tony turned to look at Bruce, who was gapping at him from where he was standing near the coffee pot

Natasha dropped her knife

"What?"

Tony's eyes hesintly met the fiery red head's face, in which had a strange expression etched upon it.

Her eyes were slighter wider than usual, her lips were drawn into a thin line, and her eyebrows were furrowed in the slightest bit. She looked... confused?

How did they not know my age? It's not that hard to figure out, it's not like its all over the news or anything...

Tony opened his mouth to try to ease the situation, when the booming voice of Thor sounded out from the other side of the room,

"Is that old? You mortals have a weird concept of time. In Asgaurd, you have to be 3,000 before you reach the age of manhood"

Bruce stood up from the corner, deciding to step in,