Clear and Present Danger

Loose End

My heart was racing as I went up and walked past him. I just knew it was the liquor that kicked in and I should be able to tell him how I truly feel.

'I'm giving you a chance, SJ,' I said as I approached him. Walking past him, I took a deep breath and gave out a smile. I looked back to where he was and I could see that he stood still, apparently shocked at the words that I just blurted out.

I know I just had to give him that chance. Why would I even allow myself to be here with him when I didn't have that in mind yet?

'Yeonssi,' he called out. Even now, the way he called me changed. And I like it.

Probably for the first time in my life I felt like a man was true to me. I felt like he was genuine in his feelings, and I just saw how he was with it. Other men whom I have gotten involved with just wanted me to be their trophy.

I think I just found the one who may have never thought of using me that way.

'Are you, are you telling me,' he said, stuttering. Seo Jin looked cute when he said those words, with his eyes, even though we were covered in a darkness that was called the night, seemed to sparkle.

'Are you telling me that we are going to date now?'

I smiled as I walked back to where he was.

'Yes. I think we are starting to date now,' I said. 'But can we take things slow, SJ?'

All of a sudden he hugged me, and it was my turn to be surprised. I could not move, his bigger frame fully enveloped my smaller one. I could feel his muscles and was amazed at how it would be to be held by his arms the whole time. I tried to circle my arms around him, and because he was too big for me, I settled my hands on the small of his back.

Closing my eyes, I wondered. How would it feel to be loved by a man whom I have never truly known just yet, but then I treaded the waters with?

'Yes, Yeonssi,' he said. 'We can take things slow. Can we stay this way first?'

It was then when I felt my tears falling down. Somehow I felt that he was the answer to my prayer.

The night went by and the first light of the morning broke. I was up early, and I was amazed that the dreams did not come that night. I smiled to myself, thankful that another day was given to me. Another chance. Another shot at life.

Seo Jin wasn't up just yet, but I was already outside. In the stillness of the morning, with the early rays of the sun just starting to give light to everything that it surrounded, I walked around the bamboo forest. Smelling the fresh scent of mist and dewdrops of the early morning and listening to the soft rustles of the leaves was enough to make my day, and it was made even better by the presence of someone close to my heart. I know it was just the first night after I said yes to him, but then I felt like he was with me for a long time.

I stood there as a gust of wind came by and closed my eyes once more. This is the tranquility I longed for. This is the feeling that I have been wanting to feel ever since Abeoji died. I realized that as time went by I was sinking deeper and deeper into the realm of darkness when I started to take matters into my own hands. I didn't know I was neck deep buried in my personally-dug pit of vengeance.

Then Seo Jin came along. He was like the sunshine in the middle of the pouring rain. Literally and figuratively. He came over just when I was thinking of how to find the last two persons in the book that I had stored away in Abeoji's chamber. I tried not to think about him that day, but then he showed up once more at Myeongdong Cathedral.

How can that be a coincidence?

'Hi.' Someone with a velvety, baritone voice called up behind me. I looked over to where the voice came from. He looked wonderful in his morning get-up of white shirt, jeans and jacket. Not to mention his hooded eyes that looked at me as if I was the most beautiful woman and wearing his famous, dimpled smile. I guess Hyo Jin was right. He may just be the man who could save me.