clean slate | charlie swan

~ the one where things get scary

Alex lays awake, all alone in bed, staring at the dark ceiling. She hasn't been able to sleep since the last call with John so it's been... Quite a while. She can't remember the last time she slept more than an hour or two. It's easier with Charlie beside her but he's gone fishing for the weekend, something he had planned way before Alex moved in. She could call Cammy but its just been moving day for them so they're probably still up unpacking. So she just lays awake, staring into the dark.

Her phone rings loudly causing her to let out a small scream and cover mouth. She shaking reaches out for it seeing an unknown number. "Please don't be him..." she whispers, her thumb shakily pressing answer. She hits speaker.

"Darling... Why are you doing this?" His deep voice says.

Alex covers her mouth to hold in and muffle her scared, heavy breathing. She doesn't respond. "Ally, baby, come on. Let me come and get you." He says. "I promise I won't mess up again. I promise I will forgive you if you forgive me."

"F-forgive me?" She whispers.

He chuckles, knowing she wouldn't resist defending herself. "Yes. For not being able to give me a baby. I can forgive you for that, so why can't you forgive me for my mistakes? Darling, let's just put this past us. We were happy until Camilla got in your head."

"No. No I wasn't happy." She cries. "I hate you, John, I wish you'd burn in hell!"

"You filthy little slut!" He yells.

Alex quickly hangs up and cries, putting a pillow over her face. Her heart races to the point her chest hurts. She sits up and flinches as the wind blows a branch against the window. She shakily climbs out of bed and rushes down the hall to Charlie's room, grabbing one of his flannels and slipping it on before she climbs into his bed and cuddles up. She tries to breathe normally but the pain in her chest doesn't stop, extending all down her abdomed. She closes her eyes and shakes her head.

Is it a heart attack? She's not even 35, it can't be.

Just a panic attack. Gotta be.

But what if it isn't?

Eventually she shuffles back to her room, shaking as she dials Bella. She grips the stair railing as she slowly walks down the steps, one by one.

"Alex? Is everything okay?" Bella asks as she finally answers.

"I-I don't mean to bother y-you but I t-think I need to go t-to the hospital." Alex gasps out, sinking down to sit on the bottom step.

"Are you okay?" Bella says, grabbing her keys. "Carlisle!" She calls. "Alex, where are you?"

Alex leans her head on the railing as she closes her eyes, her breathing heavy. "S-stairs. I don't mean to-to be a bother."

"You're not, not at all. I'm on my way, I need you to call an ambulance." Bella says, already in the car.

"No, no, no." Alex shakes her head. "I-it isn't that bad, I swear."

Carlisle takes the phone. "Alex? My names Carlisle, I'm a doctor and friend of Charlie's. Can you tell me why you're having difficulty breathing?"

Alex takes a moment before she can answer, catching her breath slightly. "Chest hurts. A-and stomach."

"Is your left arm hurting?"

"I-I guess, I don't know." She says.

"How old are you Alex?"

"Thirty f-four." She clears her throat. "Healthy as a horse."

"Is the door unlocked, Alex?" He asks.

"I-I got it." She says, pushing herself up. She reaches over and twists the locks, pulling the chain off. As she does, it opens. "Oh-"