I am not a cheater

Chapter 12

Shen Wei follows Zhao Yunlan to visit Mian on the next day. She saw Mian is still depended on the heart machine and oxygen mask. Not only that, she saw Hun keeps wiping Mian's bleeding nose, affected by Mian's sickness. Mian's body has bruises and red marks, swollen for the sickness effect. Suddenly Shen Wei's heart is wrenching to see the bad condition of Mian right now.

'How cruel I am to not pity on her for a tiny bit before this. If I think of her as a cruel girl to make Yunlan did harshly to me, am I the same too to not pity on her? I am carrying away with my hatred on her for what was happened to me with Yunlan. I am too cruel to not help her. It's not waste to help her for that bone marrow transplant. She has Hun now. As Yunlan said and Hun as well, she tries to love Hun instead of Yunlan. Maybe I should help her. Didn't I get my family back after the long years I am alive? Didn't they try to accept me as their family? Didn't Hun already tell everything to me that Mrs. Shen... I mean my mother didn't abandon me but just a misunderstanding? Even Mian tried to accept me as her elder twin sister. Why I can't accept her either? She is not wrong to just know me now. The one who should be blamed of is my father, not Mian or my mother. Mian is wrong for what she did to Yunlan. She didn't know that I will meet with Yunlan and being the victim for Yunlan's hatred on her back then. And now Yunlan already knew what was actually happened. So, it must be hard for them to forgive each other. But me... I just make them being harder for my stubbornness to not forgive them. I can forgive Yunlan for Yunlan did to me back then and Yunlan was changed now. Why not I forgive Mian and my mother too? So that I can get my family back. Maybe we will be awkward for the beginning but in the end, who knows that we can be a happy family again. How about my father? Should I forgive him too?' Shen Wei inwardly talked to herself while drowning long for her thought over them all, made Zhao Yunlan as her side frowns to see her.

''Zhao Wei?'' Zhao Yunlan called while touching Shen Wei's shoulder, startling his wife that spacing out too long.

''Huh?! Sorry,'' Shen Wei startled and then she apologized.

''Why are you sorry? What are you thinking, Zhao Wei?'' Zhao Yunlan asked with worry.

Shen Wei sighs.

''Yunlan, am I really cruel to you, to Mian and to my mother too?'' Shen Wei suddenly asked.

''Why are you asking me that?'' Zhao Yunlan asked back while leaning on the transparent wall that can see Mian from the outside of ward since Mian is still in the ICU ward.

''I feel like I am too cruel to punish Mian and my mother for what was happened in my life. I kept blaming on them for what was my father did in abused me, beat me and sold me to Zhujiu. I thought because of they left me behind, I lived in that miserable and suffering life. I kept blaming on Mian for what was you did to me back then. I feel like you accepted me now because of you are pity on me, Yunlan. I feel like you didn't love me but you love her more than me,'' Shen Wei said her feeling.

Zhao Yunlan sighs to hear that.

''Zhao Wei, for how many times should I tell you that I love you more than her now. I told you that I realized now that I just influenced by her harsh did with me and I just had a feeling to her like... you know... a s*x slave... something like that. I realized now that I don't love her as much as I love you. I told you I want to change and I don't want to be like my dad to treat bad on my girl in my life. Enough with what was happened between me and Mian back then. We both want to change, Zhao Wei. We both found our true lovers. Zhao Wei, if you can't let us to change, forever you will feel this miserable mind. You can't forgive us and with that you can't live happily in your life. Why not you give a chance to your heart to forgive them two and try accept them in your family. I am sure Hun can help you and me to guard on Mian. I am sure Mian is trying to not involve in our marriage life. Maybe in the beginning, we will feel the awkwardness amongst us, but soon we will be fine. We can be like a family, Zhao Wei. You know, since I met you and till now, even till forever, only you in my heart. No one else. No Mian and no other girl, Zhao Wei. Just you, Shen Wei. My wife, Zhao Wei,'' Zhao Yunlan assured again for how many times he didn't know within this week but still he keeps assuring to Shen Wei without a give up.