a collection of loneliness

Not About Angels

The rain soaked my clothes and my hair was heavy from the weight of the falling water. Cars were driving by, water was splashing in puddles from theirs wheels. The night was dark and the clouds covered the sparse light the moon lambent in the darkness. I glanced over my shoulder and saw people running through the rain, heading somewhere or just trying to flee from where ever they were now.

I sat down at the nearest bench, appreciating the moment and tried not to think about what just happened. But as I focused on different things the thoughts came back to me just like a sticky tune you cannot get rid of.

The rain soaked through my cloths and I felt the cold coming through my neck, floating down my back and spreading over my chest. As soon as I closed my eyes, the moment replayed. I saw her again, falling, shouting. There was nothing I could have done, I felt so helpless and unimportant when the fate came with no mercy.

I shook my head, climbing my way back to reality. The cold was still there but the rain was gone. The moonlight was fighting its way through the dark, like a despising warrior. Ivy has been there all my live. It was an accident, we all knew that, but it was not unavoidable. It was not my fault. It was not their fault, it was nobody's fault, there was nobody to blame. It just made everything worse.