Loverboys || Wolfstar Raising Harry Au

I'm sorry

Tw: mention of death

January 18 1982

Sirius paved down the road of the small town holding Harry in his arms,Remus a few steps behind them.It was past 7p.m and the streets where empty.It was a really small village though so that could justify it.

The streets were covered in snow as more was falling to earth covering the new footprints they left behind.Harry was wearing three sweaters and a jacket much to big for him with a beanie and a scarf.He little glasses where slipping down his nose all of it making him look like a mini marshmallow.Sirius was tucking Harry's hands on the inside of his leather jacket so that they wouldn't get cold.

Sirius was walking down the desserted road for what seemed like ages Remus following close behind playing with his scarf.Sirius had been preparing himself mentally since last night.Yet the moment he saw the sign that read "GODRIC'S HOLLOW CEMETERY" he felt his heart drop to his stomach.He immediately froze at the entrance.

"Are you coming love?" Remus asked the raven haired man cautiously as if words could break him.

The other just nodded.Remus began walking leading the way inside the small gate.Sirius was completely out of it.He was walking behind the other male tugging closer at Harry and eyeing the names on the tombstone's on his left and on his right.Too many tombstone's for such a small town too many names.Sirius felt panic rising at his throat as he read the names.
John and Clara Abner,George Chase,Lucy Till,James and Lily Potter.

Sirius stopped.He had been dreading this moment.He had been thinking about it everyday.Yet nothing could have prepared him for the sight in front of him.He read the names once more just to make sure he was seeing well.He felt weak in his stomach.His breathe was coming out uneven as if someone had punched him.He felt his eyes sting with heat and he tried to swallow as his throat became dry despite the freazing temperature.He felt weak in his entire body.Like he suddenly lost the world under his feet.As if suddenly he fell into a black hole that sucked him deeper and deeper as he eyed th tombstone in front of him letting the realisation sink in.

Fortunately Remus had seemed to sense the change and immediately reached out to take Harry in his embrace."Let me hold Harry for you." he said.

Surprisingly Sirius was lost in his thoughts and he didn't react at all.He only tightened his grip at the bouquet of flowers in his hand that he had bought on the way there.He felt his legs to give him up and he fell to the ground directly on his knees.He couldn't hold it anymore.He couldn't hold back the tears.He sobbed, wrenching sobs that made his whole body tremble.Tears streamed down his face and he placed a trembling hand on Jame's name.He felt his heart break.A hole being made in his chest getting deeper and deeper as time past.Suddenly he completely realised what exactly have happened the past months.What he have been left with.He cried out.

"I'm so sorry brother" he gasped out still sobbing."I should have made it there quicker.I should have protected you the way you protected me.I'm so sorry.It should have been me.You should be here.I should be the one under the ground!"

He then moved his hand towards lily's name as he placed the bouquet of lilies on the ground in front of him."Don't worry Lily.I will take care of your son I promise nothing will happen to him" he cried out.

He looked at the grave and cried."I'm gonna miss you so much"

Remus put a hand on the sobbing man's head stroking his hair as he tried to calm him down.But how could he?It was pointless.Tears made their way down his own face at the sight of his friends grave.Harry was too young to understand any of it.His mind couldn't process where his parents where,why the man that seemed unbreakable had broke at the sight of a debris or why the man holding him was suddenly crying too.But Harry's heart told a different story as it held memories that his head might never remember but his heart could never forget.Memories that would probably stay buried forever,bur always be with him.That's when Harry started crying too.

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They made it home an hour later.Harry had fallen asleep on the way back in Remus arms and he placed him on his crib before the two men went to their own bed.Remus changed to his set of pijamas and Sirius wore his black t-shirt with his grey sweatpants.They both made their way under the covers Sirius lying on top of Remus his head on the other's chest.The tangled their fingers together and listened to Harry's peaceful snorring.

"I've missed this.I"ve missed you" the taller boy exhaled not sure if sirius wanted to talk about their friends.

"You kept me sane in that goddamn prison cell."Sirius brushed his hand at Remus cheek kissing his nose."Everytime i felt like slipping away in that bloody cell you always brought me back."

"It's going to be so hard" Sirius said feeling his body numb.

"Yes it will.But we are together.Now and forever."

They stayed up for a couple more hours reliving memories of happier times remembering their friends as they should be remembered.Not bodies buried under ground.But people that loved,cared, lived.As the friends, their family. The brave kids that gave up their life so that their son could live his own.They were heroes and nothing else than that.

Remus looked longingly into the others eyes before leaning in for a soft kiss.The both drifted into a peaceful sleep after.

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T

his one was quite messed up😀I got sad writing it.I hope you like it lol.