Post Azkaban Wolfstar

Part I

Remus was still in love with Sirius. Despite everything. He had tried forgetting him but his heart didn't want to. His heart refused to believe Sirius had hurt James and Lily, that he had killed Peter. And now he had him back. His heart was right. Sirius was innocent.

After Remus quitted his job as a Hogwarts Professor, he went to find Sirius. He knew exactly where he was. Remus knew Sirius too well. The Potters beach house.  How many summers the Marauders spent there, now it was just an abandoned, old house. 

The relationship between Sirius and Remus was cold and awkward at first. I mean, how do you talk to someone you didn't trust, someone who you believe was a murderer? How did Remus say sorry for not trusting him, for not doing anything to help him?

Remus helped Sirius with everything he could. He had to find jobs around to provide both of them with food and other necessities. Sirius felt guilty of course. 

"You shouldn't do this for me" he said very embarrassed on one dinner. 

"It's okay Sirius" Remus said smiling "What am I supposed to do, let you starve?" he laughed a bit.

Sirius smiled painfully "You should be taking care of yourself..."

"Oh sod off Sirius and eat!" Remus gave him a comforting smile.

They cleaned around, finding lots of objects, pictures that brought back painful memories. Not only about James, Lily, Fleamont and Euphemia, but also Peter and the reminder that he betrayed them and he was the reason they were like that. 

Sirius felt so down. He was so embarrassed of himself. He always thought on killing Peter, never thought on what he was supposed to do after. He felt so disgusting to look at. He was older, skinnier, with yellow teeth. His hair had been horribly treated. He wondered what Remus thought if him now. 

Remus probably met, dated other people while he was gone. Probably he had forgotten about him. And he didn't love him anymore.

He also felt guilty for blaming Remus to begin with. He should've trusted him, his Moony and not Peter. The fucking rat. Sirius felt so stupid, he hated himself. 

They started building their relationship again. Getting familiar to each other's presence. They tried to be comfortable around each other again. The jokes and smiles between them grew little by little. There were topics they couldn't touch. Things that weren't healed yet. Sirius refused to talk about Azkaban. 

All that was until Sirius received a particular letter from Harry. The letter said his scar was hurting again. Sirius knew what this ment. He needed to see him.

"No way" Remus said "You can go back there"

"Harry's scar is hurting, he might be in danger"

"Sirius everyone is looking for you, even muggles. I'm not letting you go back there" Remus was shaking, he seemed really scared.

"I will be careful okay? I just need to see him" Sirius walked to the door. He couldn't apparate. He had to ride Buckbeak back.

"Don't make stop you Sirius. I will petrify you"

"You wouldn't dare" Sirius smiled. But Remus pointed his wand towards him. Sirius didn't have a wand yet. And he was to weak to try using wandless magic. 

"Remus.." he pleaded "Is Harry..." 

"Harry is fine, he is with Dumbledore"

"Dumbledore is not a bloody hero..." Sirius said annoyed.

"Neither do you..."

"I have to go Remus. I have to" 

"No, Sirius. You will be in danger"

"Why do you care?.. "

"BECAUSE I LOVE YOU" Remus screamed with tears on his eyes "I love you. I can't loose you again. It hurt so much the fucking first time. If I loose you again, I might die" 

Remus covered his face on his hands sobbing. Sirius sighed relaxing. He walked towards him. He took Remus' hands off his face. 

"I love you too" he said tearing up "I've always loved you"

Remus kissed him. They devoured each other like they've been longing to do this for so long. They were hungry for each other.

Later that night, while Remus was sleeping, Sirius lay awake. He was so worried for his godson. Sirius couldn't do anything to save James and Lily. But this time he was going to do what was possible to protect Harry. He had to go. 

Sirius watched Remus sleep. He missed that so much. He never thought he got to have Remus in his arms again. But Harry was first. It was the least thing he could do in memory of James and Lily, for being so stupid to cause their deaths. Sirius kissed Remus hair smelling him in. 'I love you' he whispered. And riding Buckbeak, he left. 

Remus woke up the next day. Sirius wasn't next to him. Remus jumped out of bed and looked for him around the house. Screaming his name. Until he saw a note on the kitchen:

'I'm sorry Rem, but I had to go. I had to see him. Don't worry about me, I will be careful and don't come for me, it would complicate things. 

I love you, 

Padfoot'

Remus finished reading the letter and he brusted into tears. 

There were months of torture. Four months to be specific. Of not knowing anything about Sirius. Remus kept searching to every day Daily Phophet, with fear to read that Sirius had been captured. 

Sirius lived at the Forbidden Forest as Padfoot. Stealing food and Daily Phophet's to know what was happening. He fed himself only on rats or other creatures he could find. He saw Harry and his friends once. And he was constantly watching him, observing who was around him, who talked to him or anything suspicious. He missed his Moony. But he must've been angry at him for leaving that way. 

It wasn't until June that Sirius returned. The Triwizard Tournament was over and The Daily Phophet was crazy about Cedric Diggory's death. Nobody understood what was going on. Or if Harry had something to do with it. 

Remus put the Prophet down. His head was hurting. Remus heard a crack outside and he went pale. He went to the door slowly, wand in hand. He was shaking. But it was Sirius, his Padfoot was back. He looked skinnier and sicker.

Remus ran towards him but instead of kissing him, he grabbed his robes. 

"You fucking son of a bitch" he said "Are you kidding me?"

"Rem.."

"I was fucking worried about you! Shit" Remus hit Sirius repeatedly "Don't ever do that again, fucker! Shit!" 

Sirius smiled "I missed you too" he said hugging Remus who cried on his chest. 

Sirius told Remus everything that happened to Harry at the Graveyard. How Cedric died. Voldemort was back. And Dumbledore wanted the Order to reunite. There was another war. 

Remus was so scared. Not for the death eaters. But because he had already lived a war. It was hell. Everyday death, decay, fear. He remembered well. Remus was mainly scared to loose Sirius again. To loose Harry. He was freaking scared of ending up alone all over again.