To Her

Ending and Beginning

TW: talks of suicide attempts and suicidal thoughts.

•••

Hermione's days passed like a blur, the residue from her tears and the puffiness of her eyes from her crying making it difficult to see anything she attempts to do. She called in sick to work for the past week, needing the time to come to terms with what had happened.

One day she found herself in a routine of eating breakfast at noon and enjoying a firewhisky at 1 pm. After a few days of this, and on which she assumed was a Saturday or Sunday, her floo roared with green flames.

She looked behind her, more curious than she was scared that an unexpected guest came into her home in the early afternoon hours. She would've been more scared if 2 glasses of firewhisky weren't already flowing through her bloodstream.

A dark-haired witch walked through with two bottles of wine and take out, and to Hermione it was like she saw an Angel.

"Hermione, love," Taura gave an apologetic smile to her friend who was laying on the couch with her cat. She scurried over and set everything down before looking at her, "I thought we could have a girl's night. It might help. We could talk, we could not talk, we can drink."

Hermione felt warm, happy for the first time since Ron left. "Thank you, Taura. Really." She sat up with a struggle and offered Taura a glass of the wine she'd brought. "If I knew you were coming I would have cleaned myself up a little bit." She laughed as she looked at her attire a bit embarrassed; a ragged jumper and fuzzy pyjama bottoms with a bird's nest for hair.

She sat back down with two glasses and started to pick at the take out she'd brought.

Taura looked at her broken friend. Eye bags as if she hadn't slept in days, knotted hair, rugged clothes, a blank stare as if she had no thoughts or emotions. She could tell Hermione had been forcing smiles and upheld a happy facade for the sake of avoiding questions and judgmental looks.

Avoiding the basic questions such as, 'are you okay?' and 'How are you holding up?', Taura dug deeper, "It was Malfoy, wasn't it?"

Hermione looked up instantly at the sound of his name. She thought for a bit, almost not knowing the answer but quickly found her train of thought, "I believe it was a factor." She replied with a small nod, taking a sip of her wine.

"I know you're very hurt about Ron. I can understand why. But like I said before, I could never picture you both together." Taura said softly, hoping Hermione wouldn't take offence to her bold statement.

Then the dam that Hermione didn't even know she held up bursted, "He was my best friend since I was 11. We'd been through so much together and I feel like a piece of my soul has been broken off and destroyed. I don't know what to do, what to think. Am I still able to be friends with Harry? Do I go back to being friends with Ron or is everything completely done now? Even our friendship?" She sobbed. She thought of Malfoy, though. Even during her heartbreak. "What if I do have feelings for Malfoy? What happens then? I'd denied it when Ron asked me if I did, it would seem like I lied to him." She cried even more.

"It's all very new Hermione, I'm sure he's asking himself the same questions. With what you both have been through, I think in time you will return to know each other as best friends. But for now, you need to worry about yourself and pick up the pieces." She held the Golden witch's hands as she talked to her with soft words.

Taura had always knew the right words to say, whatever the situation was. While it did make Hermione feel better, she couldn't stop thinking of Malfoy.

"You don't have to admit it right now. But I can see it, Hermione. You care for him. Malfoy. And I believe the feelings of worry you have toward Malfoy was a mask for the true feelings you have for him."