Saving You

Ep 1c: Make Me Beautiful

A/N: 2/28/2021

Sung

The two doctors walked in together, and I was immediately jealous. I can't say why. There was just something between the two. They seemed not to like each other very much but were very comfortable together, in a way that bespoke intimacy.  It made me smile when she took a few unconscious steps back from him. I didn't want them to be comfortable together. I wanted the lady doctor to be comfortable with me.

The two spoke back and forth, and then she asked why I didn't want the surgery. I knew what she was saying wasn't precisely what he was saying. The man had been much ruder, I could tell from Ji hoon's frown. I smiled a funny retort to her question that I thought of but didn't realize I said anything at all out loud until I looked at Ji hoon.

"Sung Jin, let me handle this!" Oh, I wouldn't hear the end of it if I embarrassed the company now. So, I closed my eyes and let him take over.

The lady doctor was understanding and somehow made the male doctor understand his concerns. Then, he heard Ji hoon whisper into his ear. "They are going to bring in a plastic surgeon to make sure you do not scar badly."

"He will make me beautiful?" I asked Ji hoon

"He will make your scar beautiful." I could tell he was pleased with my response. It was not perfect but not as crazy as before. Buoyed by this, I looked back at the doctors and made my choice.

"Okay, make me beautiful," I ordered as I tore the stupid gown off my body and insisted they show me where the cuts would be. I wanted the lady doctor to show me, but she just translated for the male doctor and stood back. I don't know why she didn't touch me. She looked like she wanted to. I felt pride flush through me when her cheeks pinked up at the sight of my bare skin. She appreciated the body I had worked hard for but didn't come any closer to me. I wanted her to come closer, to touch me.

After explaining everything to me through the lady doctor, Dr. Smith left. I was pleased to hear the lady doctor asking permission to stay. She was so formal. I wanted her to smile, to relax.

"Yes, pretty doctor, you can stay. Do you like what you see? Do you want to touch it too?" I answered with flare, lifting my gown again.

I thought it was funny, but I saw from embarrassment on Ji hoon's face that it had not been funny. Ji hoon leaned over me to put the gown back on and cover up my body. I wanted to fight him, but something about the disappointment in the lady doctor's eyes stopped me. She looked like she was struggling to come to terms with what I had said. This sobered me, I had insulted the lady doctor, and I had not been the first man to do so. I could tell that she was deciding if she wanted to put me in the box with the other men who had disappointed her. I didn't want that. I wanted her to like me.

Ji hoon struggled with the gown, and I could see her smile and make a decision. She leaned over and began to help Ji hoon, snapping the garment together at his shoulder. Her face was so close to mine, but she didn't look at me. I had said something wrong enough that she wouldn't meet my eyes. But she had to like me. She had to care. She was the only one in this hospital other than Ji hoon who could understand me, who could help me.

As she finished and began to pull away, fear welled up in me, and I couldn't resist the impulse. I grabbed her hand, trying to keep her close for just a minute longer. Every fear I had threatened to come out. I was proud of myself for voicing only one, "Surgeon is good?"

Her face softened. The tension I had felt in her hand when I grabbed it went away. She looked at me and comforted me. I don't remember everything we said right then, but I remember her promising to stay with us. I didn't want to let go of her hand, but I knew I had to when she asked. I couldn't treat her how other men treated her. I had to be special to her.