Tae is a bored college student with too much energy, JK is an idol who wants a look at normal life -or to spy so he can see how his fans like his new album...
With a deep scan on stan Instagram, they both come across something called "Kpop penpaling...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
"Hey, couldn't sleep?"
Taehyung looked at the boy hunched over the kitchen island in shock, not expecting anyone else to be awake. "Uh, no. Not really." Taehyung doesn't think he could ever go to sleep after watching that video. Everything was just confusing. What was he imagining and what was real? He didn't know.
"Me neither," he sighed, cheek smushed against his hand, elbow on the table. "Do you...do you wanna sit?" he asked hesitantly.
Taehyung nodded, hopping the rest of the way down the stairs before using his crutches to bring him to the kitchen. What better way to figure out his feelings than by talking to the idol himself.
"How's the ankle?" JK asked as Tae set the crutches against the island.
"Eh, could be better," he shrugged. "So why are you up?" Taehyung asked. Everyone else went to sleep an hour ago, Jin following them as soon as he sent the video.
"Mm," he hummed, "there's just a lot on my mind...You?"
"Same," he whispered from across the table, taking in JK's appearance. He was wearing a baggy T-shirt with his hair tousled in all directions as if his hands were raking through it constantly. He looked tired, but also stressed. What reason would he have to be stressed though?
"How about we both say something that's on our minds? We don't have to be specific, just...general. You know? Maybe it'll help."
Was that stupid? That might be really stupid...Taehyung doesn't know but he does know there's a lot circling his mind right now and it may help to just let it out.
"Yeah, that sounds nice," he answered. He tapped the table top a few times with his fingers before bringing his other hand down and sitting straighter in his chair. "You're gonna have to stop me if I rant though, I have a habit of doing that," he smiled shyly.
"Don't worry about that. I'll listen anyways."
"Okay," he exhaled. "I don't even know where to start. I guess a while back I did something that maybe I shouldn't have? But I don't regret it, I more just regret the way I've been handling it. I've been talking to someone and I haven't been honest and it's really been tearing me apart inside. It'd be easier if I just stopped talking to them, but I don't want to do that. It's the last thing I want to do."
Taehyung nodded his head, silently asking him to keep going.
"And I'm afraid this person will find out I haven't been completely honest with them and they'll hate me for it. But I think I'm more afraid of them finding out from someone other than me. I think I owe them that much...I just really don't want to hurt them, you know? That's the last thing I want to do."
The man was looking at Taehyung with such worry between his brows and stress painting his features. It was sad to see, but Taehyung understood.
"Do you want my advice?" Taehyung asked.
"Yes, please." It was sad how desperate he sounded as he scratched the side of his head. Taehyung could tell this had been eating him up inside for a while.
"I think it's better to be honest than to lie. And if this other person really likes you, then they'll stay. It may hurt them that you weren't being completely honest, but I think it'll hurt a lot less if they hear the truth come from you, not someone else."
He nodded, looking down at the kitchen island they were sat at. "Yeah, you're right. I just don't know if our relationship is strong enough to endure that. But I don't want to drag this out any longer than it has been."
"Then don't," Taehyung said, meeting JK's eyes again. "Find a way to tell them. And if all shit hits the fan, you'll have us to come to."
"Thanks, Tae. That means a lot. Thank you."
"Of course."
"So what about you? What's on your mind?"
You. "There's this person...and I...I find them hard to read...but at the same time I feel like they're not concealing anything," he spoke slowly, trying not to give anything away, but still talk his feelings through. "I don't really know how to explain it...and I don't know how to explain my feelings towards them. I can't tell what's real versus what I think is real but is actually not...sorry," he chuckled. "I know I'm not making much sense," he finished, anxiously picking at the sleeves of his sweatshirt.
"No," the other shook his head. "I think I get it."
"You do?" Taehyung didn't even get it...how could he?
"Yeah. I may be wrong, but I think you're just not admitting what's real to yourself. It's the doubt that's telling you whatever you're feeling isn't real...or maybe it's because you're scared? I'm not sure. But I think if you just push all of those negative emotions aside you may see what's actually in front of you instead of what your mind is manifesting."
Huh. Taehyung blinked at the younger several times, shocked at how dead on he is. Any person who'd watch that video would see what's in their eyes, would see the way the man in front of him looks at him, would see that he's a lot more comfortable around him than he is some of the others. Anyone with eyes could see...Taehyung could see, if he just admitted it to himself.
"Sorry, was I completely off? Or did I over step? I didn't mea-."
"No. No, you didn't over step," Tae interrupted. "That's actually really good advice, thank you."
The idol looked down, tracing the marble surface with his pointer finger, following the cracks and swirls. "I'm glad I could help," he said finally.
