my dear delilah - criminal minds

vivant

{TW scars and mentions of sacrifice}

Delilah fell ill for a few days meaning she was unable to join the team on their next case.

However, Spencer Reid had been radio silent since her first case in the field.

No calls, no messages, no visits.

The team had been great though. Hotch ringing Delilah to check in.Garcia bringing her soup. Even Emily rang her to make sure the event didn't cause too much PTSD.

But nothing from the one person she so desperately wanted to speak to. Spencer Reid.The words of Garcia "He will come to you." echoing in her ears.

A sense of solitude flooded Delilah whenever she felt disconnected from Spencer. His presence felt distant from her but the idea of speaking to him seemed somehow worse.

Walking up to the medicine cabinet , Delilah pulls out some pain killers due to her head throbbing constantly. Her eye still stinging from her recent injury.

Her mind wandering to the thought of Dr Reid; the realisation of her growing affection towards him. It wasn't exactly a shock to her but at the same time she wasnt exactly sure what her feelings meant. Delilah has only ever seen the 'love' her father has expressed. Murder,god,sacrifices and blood. Recently, the night terrors had become monstrous. Her father and even her mother were clawing their way into her mind. Uncovering her arms, she looks down at the deep scars her mother had given her. The wounds being one of the reasons she's distant from Spencer. She knew that deep down everyone has their wounds and scars but her's were visible. The idea of Reid seeing them petrified her.

Delilah's mother (Elizabeth) believed strongly in blood sacrifices. From as young as 5, Delilah was forced to partake in sacrifices for her mother. Elizabeth thought Delilah carried the purest blood; she was forced to participate up until her mother's death. Elias never disagreed with Elizabeth's methods but he would often find other ways to abuse Delilah. Pushing her around, hitting her, anything that could hurt her physically as well as mentally.

With the frightful memories plaguing her mind, she decides to lay her head down in an attempt to alleviate her insomnia.To heal.

On the other hand, Spencer was much more focused but very hostile towards the team. Every one of them attempting to convince him to speak to Delilah but he would not listen. The refusal was consistent.

He made it seem as if despised Delilah when in reality he craved her presence. The idea of heartbreak was daunting for him. Not just because of Maeve but also because of how he has been abandoned throughout his whole life. His father, Gideon, Maeve. Some meaning to leave and others not. However, this didn't make it easier for him. If anything, it made it worse. Spencer had made a promise. One he had made to himself subconsciously. A promise to never fall again. But truth be told, he had already broken it.

They both continued trying to deny their connection to one another. Their intense longing looks, their fiery flirtation, the constant focus on one another and their trusting intimacy. They would never admit it for numerous reasons but they were consumed by one another.

Arriving back after solving a case, Spencer sits at his desk with hurt and desolation.

Blake approaches him with some caution "Hey how are you feeling?"

Spencer sighs softly "I'm sorry for being so blunt lately I'm ju-"

Before he can finish his sentence, she interrupts "You don't have to apologise. I understand. You have been through alot and clearly Allison means a lot to you and that's okay. It's not wrong for you to feel things after Maeve. If you ever want to talk about it i'm here for you."

Spencer smiles bleakly towards her "Thank you but I think i'm going to head home now. Have a good night."

"You too." she replies smiling widely.

Meanwhile, JJ gives Delilah a visit to check up on her.

Delilah awakening from her slumber, grabs her head noticing her discomfort has now faded. Opening the door, she reveals a smiley JJ asking her the question she dreads every single time "How are you?"

Delilah sighs lightly "I actually feel alot better. Thank you for checking up on me."

"It's okay. I'm also here to talk to you about something else."She states looking towards the door.

"Spencer is really hurting. I don't know what happened between you both but I know it's hurting you too. Now i'm not saying you have to apologise for anything or that he does but at least speak to each other. I know he hasn't come to visit you but he's just trying to distance himself. I have no clue why but it's probably something to do with his past. I can tell you're both stubborn and don't want to make the first move but if you don't it's only going to get worse. I didn't just say this to you. I said this to him too. Just please at least think about it."

Delilah knows JJ is right but how does she go about it now? It's been a week.

"Thank you JJ, I'm going to very much consider it. I just wish I knew why he was so bitter towards me that day."

"Well i'm sure if you talk , you guys can figure it out. Anyways I have to get back home now." JJ explains with a hopeful look as she leaves.

Spencer just about misses JJ.His eyes bleak and sleepy from the difficult case the team had just solved.

With a long exhale , he stares at Delilah's door. Longing to speak to her but he couldn't. The guilt of avoiding her is so strong that he doesn't have the nerve. Instead, he turns back towards his own door, unlocking it rapidly before Delilah noticed he was outside.

Hours went by and Spencer paced continually around his apartment, debating on whether to speak to Delilah. He places a book in his hand attempting to distract himself.

While, Delilah lay in her bed attempting to watch tv but her mind wandering to other places.

Moments later a radiating knock shattered the walls of Delilah's apartment ; a smile covering her face at the thought of Spencer behind the door.

Unlocking the door she looks up ; her smile abruptly falling off her face.

A gun pointed to her head ; a young girl revealing

"I was told to give you a slow death."