Liberation [Disclosure sequel] h.s

06

Evelyn

These last few days still feel like a nightmare or a very strange surreal dream which never seemed to end. I felt I was living a life that I had no control over as if someone else was living it for me.

So here I am, back in my apartment which now felt so foreign to me, packing my belongings before embarking on an airplane tomorrow morning heading to the United States not knowing what is waiting for us on the other side of the Atlantic. Harry told me he had bought the tickets last night so we should say our goodbyes and pack our things today as we were leaving early in the morning. Not that he had many people to say goodbye to, me on the other hand, I had a very difficult farewell to do.

I haven't set foot in my apartment in too long, honestly, I don't even remember the last time I have been here at all. The only time someone had been here was Harry to pick up my mail, but other than that it remained empty since I decided to temporarily move to their house so I could spend more time with Claire in order to protect her from Howard.

Not much changed here, it was still like I left it months ago, thinking my move to Harry's place would be temporary. The only difference was a thick layer of dust covering most of the surfaces which hadn't been cleaned in many months now, or how empty it felt since I barely had anything left in here as I was slowly moving my clothes and personal belongings to Harry's house.

How is this possible?

Could I be really leaving this place forever?

It's not that I care about this studio, I couldn't care less about this place to be honest, it's the meaning behind it. When I close this door, it will be the last time I'll ever come here, I am spending my last hours in this country. 

And the worst part is: I don't know if I can ever come back.

Sometimes I wonder if this is the right thing to do, if we shouldn't come clean to the police and tell them it was not our fault. However if the gang is behind all this like we suspect they are, maybe our plan will backfire us. The last thing we want is to remain here unable to do anything to help Collin, that is not even an option. But at the same time, knowing when we leave tomorrow we will only create bigger problems also doesn't sound very appealing.

The police will come after us for not showing up for the scheduled interview, Vincent will also come after us when Harry fails to show up at the fight this Saturday. As soon as we step foot again in this country, the police will come for us, that is guaranteed maybe we will even be searched overseas who knows. 

This all felt like we were inside a Hollywood film, a very unrealistic and strange film.

I had spent last night unable to sleep, afraid of what today would bring. Yesterday, after Noah left and Harry said those pretty hurtful words regarding my mom, I simply remained in the living room asking myself if this was truly happening.

Did we really have to flee the country, was it our only option?

The more I thought about it, the more I knew we didn't have much choice. I wanted to find Collin more than anything else and knowing he was in the United States was the first step in finding him, even if I think it won't be as easy as we are thinking it will. Two days ago they were in Boston, where could they be now? We might reach a dead end as soon as we land in that country and realize there are no more clues.

My main issue right now was my relationship with Harry, because what we are about to do is probably the biggest decision in our lives so far. I know Harry doesn't care about anything else other than finding his brother, he doesn't really care about the fact he might never come back to England if that is the price to pay. But I don't think he is fully aware of the consequences of our actions, not only for him but for me as well.