I let him go

3 || im fine

I woke up with puffy eyes. I tried to hide it from my parents before I went downstairs.

When I arrived at school Alya walked up to me. She could see my puffy eyes. So she asked me:
"What's wrong?"

I didn't want her to worry about me so I said: "I'm fine." While saying that everything that happened played over and over again in my head. Which gave me the urge to cry again.
So I went to the bathroom. I washed my face. But I still felt so annoyed, That I couldn't tell him how I felt. He probably doesn't even love me back. Yesterdays thoughts kept playing over and over in my head like a movie. I sat on the floor crying. Alya came in because It took long. She heard some sniffling. Without saying anything she hugged me.

I am so lucky to have her as a friend.

After school I saw Adrien. I walked up to him.
Adrien: "Oh hey Marinette."

Marinette: "Would you like to go to the park with me?"

Adrien: "Just the two of us?"

Marinette: "Y- Yea.. or do you want to invite anyone else?"

Adrien: "No that's okay."

We walked to the park.

Adrien: "How are you?"

I stopped walking and stood still.
I didn't want to think about it again. Tears rolled down my face.

Marinette: "I- I'm fine."

Adrien: "You can be honest with me, you know that, right?"

Marinette: "Yes, thank you. But now I just want to go home."

Adrien: "I can take you if you'd like?"

Marinette: "That would be nice."

We arrived at my house. I went up my room again. And cried again.

Then I was busy thinking again:
It wasn't even such a big deal i never have been able to tell him how I feel. But what if it would be to late in the end. Why am I crying about this. It's not to big of a deal. What if he never comes to school again. He wouldn't even love me if I told him. He wouldn't even want to be friends anymore. No stop overthinking.

That night I couldn't sleep my thoughts kept bugging me.