Rock Me(A One Direction Love Story)

Chapter 16 Sorting out the Feelings

<Niall’s POV> Darkness again? I was just getting used to the light. In that light I saw people. People whose names are blurred in my mind. I know them. I know they are close to me, and I care about them. I know the names but I don’t know which person to match them with. But I don’t care. All I care about is her. Why wasn’t she there when I resurfaced. I thought that in heaven you got everything you wanted. So why is she not here? Everyone is here but her. Why? *1 hour later* There’s a faint light so I try to focus and slowly the darkness fades. I look around slowly. I’m attached to a machine. I hurt like hell. I hear a sound and I look over to see the door opening. Time stops as her face comes into focus. She’s here. She’s calling my name. “Niall, are you okay?” I cough. “You’re here.” “Yeah, I’m here. Why wouldn’t I be?” “You hate me remember,” I point out. “You know I don’t hate you Niall.” I try to respond but I’m slipping. “No,” I groan. I watch as she fades and darkness blurs my vision. *45 minutes later* Memories are starting to seep into my vision. I know I have to put the pieces together. My name is Niall Horan… I’m from Mullingar… I was in a car wreck… because… Why was I drunk? She left me… Why did she leave me? Harry… he lied to her. I can see me running to stop her but she won’t listen. A tear starts to slip out and I open my eyes back into the room. She stands up, “Hey, why are you crying?” “You left me.” “Niall I—“ “Why did you leave me,” I ask cutting her off. “I had to…I couldn’t stay there.” I turn away from her. “You left me.” “What. The. Hell.” I look over and see Zayn staring at her. “Seriously. What the actual Sh*t are you doing here?” “Stop Zayn,” I say trying to calm him down. “NO. I’m serious. How dare you come here. You caused all this you know! It’s all your fault that this sh*t happened to Niall.” “Zayn get the hell out,” I demand. He turns and stomps out. “Thank you,” she says. “Just leave. You’ve done enough,” I say cringing at my own words. She tears up and I look away. It kills me to see her walk out, but I can’t stop her. She almost killed me and I’m not taking a chance on it happening again.

<Your POV> “_____,” you hear someone calling your name. You turn and see Harry. “Don’t go.” “You shouldn’t have called me to come see him. It was a stupid idea.” “No it wasn’t you can make him feel better. I know it,” he says determined. “No I can’t he hates me because I left.” “Go back to camp, pack, and come back to the flat. Please. I’m begging you. You can make Niall feel better,” he pleads. “What makes you think that?” “When Niall falls for somebody he falls hard, and it takes him a long time to get over it. I don’t care what he says, he’s not over you.” You look down at your feet. “Zayn hates me too. Harry, I have no reason to stay.” “Stay for Niall, please.” “You have to talk to Zayn then, he hates my guts, and the way he punched that wall,” you shutter, “I’m not taking a chance on that being my face.” “Done. I’ll talk to him.” “I’ll be in the waiting room,” you say turning to the doors.

<Niall’s POV> I don’t know why I told her to leave. I guess I just figured that she wont hurt me if I hurt her first, so she won’t want to be around me. I don’t even know why I’m acting like this anyway. We weren’t even close. Oh who am I kidding? I wanted us to be close. I wanted her to be mine. Is it possible to love a girl I barely even know? Whatever, it doesn’t even matter. Zayn hates her and that means her and I could never be together. We couldn’t be together even if Zayn wasn’t in the picture because she hurt me, and I don’t wanna get my heart broken in the end. I can never trust her. No matter how much I want too…

<Zayn’s POV> I’m pissed. Harry called ______, and told her about Niall. That’s why she’s here. I hate her! This is all here fault and now Harry’s trying to convince me that she can help Niall. She will never be able to help Niall. She hurt him in the first place. That’s why we’re here. Because of her. Harry wants her to stay, but I can’t wait for her to leave. I don’t get it though. Niall asked where she was when he woke up, but when she showed up he told her to leave. It doesn’t make sense. I think all five of us need to have a meeting without her and see what all of us think about it. *Meeting* We all meet in Niall’s room. Thankfully he’s awake. “How ya feeling,” I ask hopeful. “Well I’m not in much pain. My neck hurts.” I look at him. He seems inwardly troubled or dejected. “Niall… Never mind,” I say awkwardly. “Did she leave,” he asks quietly. “No, she’s in the waiting room,” I answer disgusted. “Niall, we need to know what you think of her right now,” Harry says quickly. He looks down and blushes and in that moment I realize he likes her. Maybe loves. Or he could. He wants to love her but he’s trying not to let himself because she hurt him. When I realize this I also realize that I know exactly how he feels, because I feel exactly the same way. I could so easily love her, but I can’t let myself. She hurt me and him. She’s trouble for either of us. And even if I let myself love her, I would be in a competition with Niall. Could I do that to him? Could I honestly steal a girl that he might love? Yes, I could. I deserve her more than him. No, that would be wrong. What am I even saying? I hate her. Ugh. I don’t know how I feel. “It’s settled then,” Harry pulls me out of my thoughts. “Niall cares about her. She should stay.” “She hurt him,” I point out. “No,” Harry says, “It’s my fault Niall’s in this mess. Im the one who lied to her and made her leave. It’s my fault. Not hers.” Niall looks at me pleading and I realize he’s asking if I will let her stay. I sigh. The temptation of her. Could I deal with that? Could I deal with seeing her perfect face every morning and not being able to reach out and caress it? Could I deal with not being able to kiss her succulent lips? Could I deal with the temptation of her? There is no choice, I have to be able to deal with it for him. “Harry, help her get her stuff back to the flat,” I say and I see everyone breathe out a sigh of relief. “And guys,” I add, “Can we try not to have any disagreements please. If she leaves again we aren’t chasing after her.” I see Niall bite his lip. He’s nervous. We both know it’s not going to be easy having her in the house. He knows how he feels about her. He’s pretty much got the whole puzzle put together. The only part he’s missing is the part where I’m in love with her too.