Book Reviews (Requests closed)

'When I First Met You' by aaftermathh

The cover

So, the cover feels a bit simple to me. I like the note idea but it would have made more sense if either Susan or Xavier would actually be writing this instead of Susan just looking back on their time together.

It's not a bad cover but I do feel like there could be better options.

The title

Makes a lot of sense with the story but I feel like this title isn't unique or different enough to actually stand out.

It's crazy how many books there are just on Wattpad alone with the exact same title. 

I get why you picked this title but when so many other people use it as well, your book might get lost between them.

The description

You used a little bit of your story in the description before you got to the actual description. That's not necessary.

The part that starts with the line 'Sometimes, the person you love to hate becomes the person you hate to love' is really good. That part on its own is already a really good description.

That part is short, powerful and it makes me want to read the story.

If you took out the first bit, that would be a near perfect description in my eyes

The story

The first 2 chapters were a bit confusing to me. Had to read those 2 or 3 times before I got it all. That might be because I had just woken up when I started reading though.

It's a good and interesting story. 

I do feel like Susan can be a bit rude at times. Like when she talks about her old school and turns out glad that she wasn't expected to have gone there because she doesn't like being associated with 'such a bunch'. Sounds like she generalized everyone who attended that school as 'lowlifes' except for herself. Like, I'm sure there were others at that school who weren't like the rest so it's a bit mean to still generalize the whole school.

I like the insight on the early relationship between her and Xavier though and I did feel bad for her when her date basically ditched her at the Halloween dance.

I feel like sometimes you might be using pretty difficult words though, which might limit your audience.

My final judgement

The story is interesting and you are a good writer. 

For people like me, for who English isn't their native language, some of the more difficult words might be hard to understand and I think that might also be the case for younger audiences.

Luckily my English is pretty good so I understood it but most people in my country for example aren't as good at English as I am.

Make sure to consider this as you write.

But again, I do like this story. It has room for improvement in some areas but I already pointed those out by now.

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Hey aaftermathh!

Hope I wasn't too critical and that you appreciate this review. My reviews are only my opinion but my comments are only meant as tips to help you improve.

You haven't been on Wattpad long so don't take too much weight to my opinion. You are just starting out so over time you will develop your writing on your own. We have all been there and believe me, my own stories were wayyyyy worse when I first started. I'm sure you will do great as a writer❤️