california likes luigi. just has the vibes yk (also im just Constantly thinking about luigis mansion)
new york w/ rodents for pets superiority i already said this but motherfucker i like it (not even just rats yk like... dude probably likes ferrets)
florida can and has eaten an entire container of those sugar cookies from walmart that are probably super bad for you but taste REALLY GOOD
the almost comedic stash of gatorade in floridas room because.. yeah (mf looks like he likes the light blue ones yk)
gov calls the gatorades by their actual flavor names and Everyone wants to beat the shit out of him for it
absolutely no snacks in the statehouse last longer than a day. if theyre not gone by 12am either florida steals them, some state comes down for a midnight snack, or gov has them for "lunch" (better known as the "hasn't slept in 28 hours and has lost track of the time at which he is eating" meal)
the only way a snack lasts any longer than that is if theyre hidden in someone's room (alaska is good at hiding snacks)
i cannot explain why. but something tells me new york likes princess daisy better than princess peach.
cheesm
texas looks like he likes bbq chips. florida looks like he likes doritos. california looks like he likes original lays. ny looks like he likes some obscure chip nobody has ever heard of. mass looks like he likes sour cream and onion chips. gov looks like he only knows like 3 chip flavors.
going back on the princess daisy thing. mf defends his opinions with his life. someone said daisy doesnt even do anything and ny broke an arm (and it was not his)
georgia rates places hes slept:
bathtub: 7/10 comfy but got yelled at to move so someone could shower
couch: 7/10 high traffic area, wakes up to someone watching tv
bed: 10/10 classic, comfy, warm. immaculate
outside: 3/10 cold
in his closet: 9/10, weirdly cozy. was not found for 16 hours
alaskas room: 4/10 got caught really fast because the motherfucker just Knows. was very cold and he had to haul his three blankets out into the hallway
hallway: 6/10 comfy but high traffic, got kicked several times and was woken up because someone tripped over him
bathroom floor: 11/10 immaculate. cool. may have been woken up by someone but it does not matter the bathroom floor is such a weirdly nice place to lay down i highly recommend
obscure videos from yt always end up on the tv somehow. no one knows who puts them there but chances are youll wake up at 7:48 am to this video playing on the tv https://youtu.be/uerNtYhgzSw or some fuckin jack stauber shit
the tv has been used for rickrolls
the tv has been used for stickbugs
the tv has been used for gnoming people
the tv has been broken before because someone allowed a northeastern state to play mario kart
more than one northeastern state is not allowed to play mario kart at a time
chances are that unless the statehouse bends the laws of physics Several states have to get used to extremely different weather (either states like alaska have to learn how to cope with extreme heat or states like florida have to learn to cope with cold. take your pick)
texas straight up just blacked out for the entire week that the power was out in the state. where did he go? what did he do? was he just an empty shell of a man hidden somewhere? did he commit a war crime? if anyone knows it's not him
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
whats more of a cryptid: an actual cryptid or whatever tf alaska has going on
nobodies ever.. sure alaska lives there. like yeah he has a room and yeah they could technically go in there whenever they want to see if hes there but hes like schodingers (whatever tf his name was) cat. unless they see him he could literally just not be in the garage and no one would know
the only one who knows is georgia because alaska kicked him out when he tried to sleep there
texas seems like that mf to just. not knock when he walks in. he just kicks in the door and says what hes there for
bye
