FADED PETALS (On Hold)

6.

5th January
Delhi
India

Charity function

Sidharth looked at the retreating figure of shehnaaz, his eyes clouded with some outlandish emotions. He turned towards his dad who was engrossed in some small talk. Sidharth hated small talk, conversing with people without a definite reason always seemed futile.

He moved towards the farthest corner of the room, settling on a chair.

"I want to do something which no-one has ever done. Something different"

Jhilmil's voice rang in his ear as he looked at the plain curtains of the room. Why did she choose this? The question constantly infiltrated his not so calm mood.

He laid his head back, trying to adjust his frame in the small chair. He never wanted to come across her, especially after that day.

He closed his eyes to ease out his breathing.

Have you ever been to a local fish vendor? They keep a large storage tank with an air pump attached. There are many fish in it, swimming and breathing. Then a person comes and asks the fisherman for a fish. The vendor moves towards the tanks and pulls out a fish completely ignorant of the fish's constant flopping for breath. He holds the fish tight and slices through the breathing organism with a traditional iron vegetable cutter. You would notice that most of the time the cut piece of fish keeps flopping on the weighing machine before finally giving in to its fate. That was Sidharth's condition when he heard the news of his mother's death.

He had been out that day with Adith when his father called him, telling him to return home immediately.

He had to go meet Jhilmil the next day. After six long years of endless talks they were finally coming across each other in person. He felt inebriated with excitement.

When he saw his mother wrapped in a white shroud lying in the garden, he froze. His whole world was turned upside down. He had only a few people who actually cared about him and god was so cruel to snatch even those from him.

He was scared, his limbs felt heavy like stone. He was scared to go and touch her.

"Somebody please wake me up", he screamed unaware that this nightmare was his reality now.

His father sat in a corner, eyes red and swollen.

"She was met with an accident Sidharth. It was all planned. They killed her", he mumbled like a corpse. The whole garden was filled with corpses.

"Who dad?"

***

"What are you doing here?", Shehnaaz asked Rayan astonished.

"I am here to direct a show, like we are recording today's activity and then tomorrow we will head to the slum. It will be a kind of short movie telecasted to create awareness about how people are united for the upliftment of slums"

"Ohh, congrats you had always wanted to do something like this" 

"Yes, I hope it goes well. Btw why are you here?"

"I am accompanying abbu". He's there, shehnaaz pointed to Irshad who was now surrounded by some new people. God, she sighed waiting for the function to end.

"How's sitaara?"

"She's at home. I couldn't bring her here." I sighed envisaging what she must be doing at home.

"Does she miss me?"

"Yeah, actually a lot", I met Rayan in Norway. He was a tenant on the upper floor of our building. It actually felt nice to find an Indian in the unknown place.

"Are you free tomorrow?"

"I guess so. Why?"

"Umm, I was going with my team to Jenura. Will you accompany me? It would be fun."

Shehnaaz pauses for moment wondering whether it would be appropriate.

"Time?", She finally asks. She was in dire need of an outing in a chilled environment.

"Morning 9."

"Ohk, text me the address."

"Yeah sure and shehnaaz, please bring Sitaara too. She will be safe."

"Ohk", Shehnaaz chuckles at his adoration for the child. He was a good person.

He was about to say something when someone from his team called him.

"See ya. Bye". He left to join his group while Shehnaaz moved to find her seat.

Her eyes moved in the hall but this time she was not searching for her father, her eyes were looking for someone else.

She has heard his voice after six years but did it make any difference, no it didn't. He had stopped existing for her a long time back.

"The world is so populated and yet only few people know me, Jhilmil I want them to know me and understand me. I don't want to be just a name"

She spotted him in a corner typing something on the phone. She wondered whether his outlook on things had changed or were they still the same, sparse and hollow like before.

**

The auction ceremony started and all the guests were allotted places. When Shehnaaz moved towards her seat, her face fell seeing Sidharth already seated there.

She reluctantly sat, while Sidharth looked towards the otherside acting completely ignorant.

How difficult it is to pretend strangers with someone who has been an integral part of your life, both mentally cursed their fate.

The whole time shehnaaz kept her face straight looking everywhere but at Sidharth while he sat stealing glances at her. It was hard to stop himself, to stop caging her within her arms and telling that he wanted things to be normal like before. But then was it possible?

"You have changed", he said turning his face towards the stage.

"I wish I could say the same", she was not even sparing him a glance.

A round of applause filled the auditorium diverting their attention. The function was finally ending.

"I thought that you were never capable of hating anyone", Sidharth spoke with his eyes on her. "Look at me Jhilmil", his voice was stern and intimidating which added more to her infuriation.

"Listen Mr. Sidharth Rathore. It's shehnaaz for you and if you think that I hate you. You are mistaken. People like you simply don't exist for me", she smiled calmly, getting up from the chair.

"It was nice meeting you", she says following her father to the exit.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

27/02/2021

Tc
Ahsmir.

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