on call with a broken creature

Anxious

"You didnt ruin anything dear, take some deep breaths, what happened? can we help? will he be okay?"

...ok

in and out
what's that thing you're supposed to do? count? 

1..
234
5
67
8 
9  10

I didn't ruin it? y-you don't hate me?
...

my memory is spotty... I can't quite remember for sure what happened

I just have a feeling that it was something bad
a-and that I did it or it was my fault

I'm trapped here because of it... it's strange I have all of the feelings but I can't picture it or- or remember what the course of events was

ha.. hahaha 
imagine making the worst mistake of you're life and not remembering what it was

... it's not really funny

I just had to laugh... or I don't know what would happen to me

I'm honestly really scared. N̸̠̟͋͊̄̾ô̷͓̜͍͗̑̔ţ̸̮̬̞͐ ̸̨͔̘̈́̇̄o̴̬̒f̸̲̈́͛ ̸̠͕̝͊ý̴̲͎̩̤̄́o̸̦̝̐̌͘͠ṵ̸̠͑ ̴̝͔͑̆͜ͅṭ̸̓̈́̄h̵̢̀̄͘o̷͓̟͗̐̑͜u̷͖̞͔̼̒̿̃g̷̗̘̬͇̓̈́͆h̵͎̆̇. I trust you

If I just knew how you called me maybe you could try my friend's number, but it's not something I could ask of you. I don't know if I could handle it if nobody picked up

I-
he has to be okay

I hope he hasn't ended up like me

"that sounds like an awesome idea! the playlist and maybe a studio ghibli movie! it will be great!"

that does sound nice... do you have one in mind? they're all so good

they're also all sweet in a sense
and are so very beautiful...