SEONGJOONG

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Requested by MooMooMochi_3646

Grab a drink, maybe even a snack because you are in for a long ride...

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Hongjoong was a failure

He was sat on the floor of their cramped bathroom, the summer air hot and muggy, a small pregnancy test gripped tightly between his fingers.

Negative

The little sign glared at him, mocking him, crushing any remaining wisps of hope he may have ever had, breaking him.

Negative

Denied

Rejected

Never going to happen

Hot tears began to stream down his cheeks as the thoughts rampaged around his head, tearing him apart slowly.  Although, he quickly wiped them away as quiet knocking sounded through the small room, his husband's gentle voice following closely behind it.

"Kitten, are you okay...Can I come in?"

Seonghwa murmured through the door, dropping his forehead lightly against the cool wood as he heard his lover's breathing pick up, on the verge of a breakdown.

Hongjoong had stopped letting him in after the fifth test...

This was his twentieth

"Baby...Please"

Seonghwa asked again when he was met with silence, hand going up to gingerly wiggle the handle, the lock firmly in place.

Rustling could be heard from the other side as Hongjoong hastily opened a cabinet drawer, chucking the stupid piece of plastic inside along with his other failures.  The contents always taunting him of what he couldn't have.

A family

The tears that he had successfully quelled came back at full force with that one impending thought, cutting through him like a knife.

Face turning red and splotchy with unforgiving sobs consuming his body, Hongjoong ripped the bathroom door open, hurling himself into Seonghwa's warm, awaiting arms.  Not caring that he looked a mess as he clung to him firmly, burying his face into the material of his thin t-shirt, his small hands clutching it tightly.

He had given up on being strong long ago

Large, soothing hands stroked up and down along his spine, calming him down slowly.  Seonghwa's deep voice mumbling quiet reassurances into his hair.  His arms were like a thick blanket, wrapped around him snuggly, cozy and safe. Protecting him from the cruel, outside world.

Why was the world so cruel?

Why couldn't it let him give Seonghwa the one thing he wanted most in life, what he's dreamed of for years...

A baby

"I'm sorry I can't give you a family..."

Hongjoong whispered into his chest, tears soaking through the fabric.  Seonghwa's hands continued to rub along his back.

"I'm such a disappointment..."

The hands on his back stilled at the quiet confession, moving slowly up his frame until they landed delicately on his cheeks, thumbing away the hot tears.

"No....no baby, you're not a disappointment"

Seonghwa breathed, brown eyes shiny with unshed tears as he gazed at his husband, taking in his broken state.

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