It's been a week since you were rescued by the Avengers. Everything was different before you captured and taken from your home. When everyone was around you hid your pain and pretended that you were fine and the same person you were before being captured, but they all knew something was off. You let a tear slip and throw the food away, you washed the dishes and went into your room. You sat on your bed, you did everything you could to stay awake. The nightmares came after being saved. You haven't slept since being rescued. You can hear the screams in the back of your head. All you want is for the pain to be stop and for everything to be quiet in your head.
You would do anything for the memories to go away, you were fine without them.
*Flashback to a week ago*
"Please let me go please please don't hurt me," You begged as they dragged you into a chair and tied you down. They put a mouthguard in your mouth to muffle your screaming.
"I'm sorry my dear, but you must remember who you are and you can no longer go without knowing who you were meant to be," The doctor walked around your chair.
"Y/N, I'm the good guy. I know you don't want to do this but I'm this for you, there is so much potential in you, I know you miss your superhero friends but they're not coming anytime soon... ," The doctor nodded at one of the soldiers and walked into a separate room to observe and control the machine.
The soldier had a mask covering his nose and mouth all you could see was his eyes. He picks up a syringe with white metallic liquid. He flicks the needle and puts the needle into your neck and injects the liquid into your veins. The soldier walked out of the room and locked the door. You were scared and terrified of what was to come but before you could think for a second the doctor had turned on the machine. After that, all you felt was the worst sharp pain you could imagine. They did the same process again and again until you remembered everything.
*Back to Present*
It was lunchtime and everyone was taking a break from training as you were cooking and making lunch. The group was making conversation. You could hear Tony and Bruce arguing who was smarter or had the best degrees, then there was Natasha and Clint talking about past missions they did together, Wanda and Vision achieving couple goals, Thor messing around with that Spiderkid, you could hear Bucky and Steve doing their " Back in our day" talks to Sam. But you stayed quiet, they had gotten used to your quietness, but all of them worried for you. They had no idea you haven't slept in over a week. You started serving the food to everyone and they did their little thank yous.
"And last but not least Peter," You smiled and walked away. You felt so weak at that very moment before you could give Peter his food you drop his food and fainted. Luckily, Vision caught you just in time and rushed you to a bed. Tony and Bruce followed not too far behind were the other avengers.
"She is extremely sleep deprived, her pulse is low, and by the looks of it she hasn't really eaten much," Vision reported to Bruce and Tony.
"She looks so pale," Bruce trembled and set up an I.V. for you.
"I knew something was off with Y/N, I just didn't know what, we never asked what happened, she just told us she was fine," Natasha quivered. An hour later, you eventually woke up, in a room identical to a hospital room. You felt so drained and weak, not wanting to sleep and see Wanda by the door, with Tony and Vision at a counter on the other side of the room.
"What's going on," You could barely get the words out, looking at the I.V. In your arm.
"Y/N fainted while giving Mr.Parker his food. Luckily I caught you before you hit the floor. You are highly drained of energy, you haven't eaten much, and your blood pressure wasn't normal, quite low to be exact," Vision answered.
"What's going on Y/N, we thought you were just a little shaken up from being captured but we all have no idea what they did to you, we're worried for you," Tony sat down by you.
"Nothing happened. I was in a cell for a couple of days. It wasn't that ba-" Y/N was cut off.
"Cut the bullshit Y/N," Tony sighed and looked down.
"I don't want to talk about it," You whispered, tearing up thinking about it.
"Can I have some alone time please," You asked.
"You need sleep of all things," Wanda looked at you and walked up to your other side.
"N-no I don't please don't make me sleep again," You begged.
"I'm sorry Miss.Maximoff is right," Vision put a liquid into the I.V.
Knocking you out in seconds.
A couple hours later the Avengers heard screaming from the room you were placed in. They all ran to your room. Bucky ran to you first, sat on your bed and grabbed onto you while you screamed.
"Y/N wake up! It's alright!," Bucky yelled as you woke up sobbing.
" WHY?!," You screamed.
"WHY COULDN'T SAVE THEM," You kept saying it over and over again.
" HE KILLED THEM ALL! IT SHOULD'VE BEEN ME!," You screamed.
"It should've been me," You cried into his shoulder as he rocked you back and forth. Tony and Steve looked at each other absolutely heartbroken. Wanda covered her mouth with her hand and felt your pain as vision hugged her tight. Peter looked down and away to keep his composure. Bruce, Nat, Clint were in disbelief. Eventually they left one by one. Bucky stayed when he got up.
"Please stay, don't leave me," You whimpered as you grabbed his right hand.
"Y/N-,"he stopped before he could protest and came back to the bed and held you as you slept. He held you close and this continued every time you fell asleep. He became your comfort buddy. He understood what you were going through, the amount of pain and guilt you felt. He'd help you get better. He'd show you it's okay.
