Quicksilver - Jamilton -

chapter 35: Goodbye, home

James: You can come by after if you want, we could have pizza? My parents are not gonna be there, so we have the house for ourselves, and we can go on the roof!

Angelsky: It's the big day! I hope you're okay

"Get off your phone and take those boxes, the ones in the living room." Mom takes my phone and turns it off before giving it back to me.

"Hmm." I mumble with clear exasperation. 

I tried my best to pretend this day wouldn't happen, but you know, here we are! The moving day, the worst weekend, my most dreadful nightmare, or whatever you want to call it. Though, something positive did come from this, my parents are doing something together! It took a moving for that to happen, but it's happening, so... cheer for that, I guess. Ah, goddammit. I can't believe I'm doing this. I really can not believe it. This is my home, for god's sake! It's... This is not how I thought I would, for the first time, be moving from this house. I had imagined it all, me getting into a college on the other side of the country, packing my stuff but knowing I would always come back. There's no coming back now, I'm going and this is my last day in this place where I grew up, where every little details is filled with memory. That one corner where I once fell and now there's a bump. The doorframe where we measured my height each year. That one step in the stairs which was just a little bit too long, so we kept falling on it, until dad finally decided to fix it. You can still see which one it was 'cause it's slightly different from the others. Even just this living room! I played so many games there. I made forts with mom that would fill my mind with stories bigger than any others. I would curl-up behind the couch when James and I played hide-and-seek, after some time he would always find me, but it was still my favorite hiding spot. I watched so many football games where we would scream like it was a question of life and death. I practiced that one play we did in fifth grade and my parents and many would applaud me at the end as if I just did an Oscar worth performance. 

I pick up a box that mom asked me to take and just observe the room. All the frames and pictures were taken down, and everything is packed, ready to go. While looking, I realize something: I don't want to move. I want to stay here. This is my home, and no one should be forced to abandon their home forever. 'Home is where the heart is' I hear my dad say, but if that's true then I'm homeless. If this isn't where my home is, then where is it? Where is it supposed to be, huh? People love saying stupid quotes, but no one give you the answers you so desperately want- No, need. I need answers, and yet, while miss life loves to give me questions, she despises giving answers. Cruel, plain cruel. It's all a pop quiz that a horrid teacher gives to students who just started their semesters and don't know anything, but are expected to be perfect. A presentation that you didn't know you needed to do and just try to make it work, somehow. That's what life is like, or maybe it's just me. Maybe everyone knows what they're doing, and I'm just a lost child in a mall, searching for his mom. Then why isn't anyone helping me? Why aren't they telling me about those stupid pop quizzes and presentations? Is it a secret that you need to figure out on your own? If so, I'll never make it. I don't understand, and I don't know how to understand. Where should I start looking? 

I walk outside and put the box in the moving truck. Other guys are also working around me, and I just go back inside and check my phone again. 

Angelsky: Why aren't you replyinnnnng?

Angelsky: You know I might get a little, just a little, worried, huh? 

That_ one_egoccentric: please, as if. The day you start to worry, I'll be the president. 

Angelsky: You're right, you don't have the brain cells to be the president. Oh, and how's it going? 

That_one_egoccentric: Not bad. I didn't yet have a melt down, so that's good.

Angelsky: Really? You just made me lose ten bucks.

That_one_egoccentric: Did you bet on me having a melt down?

Angelsky: I won't deny this possibility, and if it were to be true then it would be with Peggy, and I would be very mad about losing. 

That_one_egoccentric: Okay, miss. I have boxes to carry and if my mom see me on my phone, you might win that bet of yours. Bye bye.

I see my dad talking to a moving guy and, when he sees my staring, he runs toward me.

"Hey! I'm gonna have to go to the apartment while your mom stays here for some time. Do you want to come with me or stay?"

I consider the possibility for a moment. This would be my last moment here. Should I stay a little longer or go see my new 'home'? Would it make a difference, I anyway won't sleep here anymore, whatever I chose.

"I'll come with you, I'm tired of carrying boxes."

"Haha, you're not finished with that I'm afraid, but anyway come on! Are you hungry?"

"You're asking because you're hungry, right?"

"... Maybe, whatever your answer is I'm still gonna take food for you. I know you can't resist it."

"Yeah, well because you seem so interested to know, I am hungry."

I buckle up, and we get out of the parking. I look back at the house, one last time and mentally say my goodbyes. I'll miss you. I feel like I'm not only moving from a house, but also a part of my life. A life where things were easier. I'm officially stepping away from my childhood. Goodbye good old days, welcome whatever's next. 

Welcome to my new life.