Save Those Words For Me

STWFM

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"Yeah! The drink is mine so sagarin mo na Leal!!"

Leal took another shot. That's it girl. Natawa ako sa pulang pula niyang mukha. 2 shots palang yun ah.

"Where's Keith?"

Tanong nito. Luminga ako sa paligid para hanapin ang isa pa naming kasama na biglang nawala.

"There."

Nakita ko siya sa counter kasama ang boyfriend.

"Sana all talaga." 

Nangalumbaba ako habang nakatanaw sa mga na nagkakasiyahan sa ilalim. I wanted to go there and dance, but I can't leave Leal here alone. Lalo na at kanina ko pa nahahalata ang tingin ng mga lasing na lalaki sa baba. They're eyeing us but because we are known to be Kieth's special guess no one dared to come near us. She really wants to stop me from sleeping with another guy again. Anyway, it's not that I can't live without them, but she's just too exaggerating. After 4 months of being focus on work, kagabi lang uli ako nagkaroon Ng ka hook up then she starts to nag. I'm already 25 years old with a decent work, what's wrong with having fun with a guy for a while? Guys do that too!

"Kung tigilan mo na kasi yang bisyo mo at sumeryoso na sa lalaki, hindi ka puro Sana all ngayon."

My eyes went to Leal na nakatutok din ang mga mata sa mga nagsasayawan sa ilalim. We occupied the whole second floor, iba talaga kapag kaibigan mo ang isang Kieth Acuesta.

"I'm not tired of playing and besides kunti nalang ngayon ang matinong lalaki, kadalasan taken pa. Sisiguraduhin ko na ang seseryusuhin ko eh yung lalaking para sakin talaga."

"I wonder when you will stop."

Lumingon ako sa kanya. She took another shot. Mukhang may aalalayan na naman ako pauwi. Haist. Bakit ba palaging tinatanong sakin yan? Is it wrong to just enjoy someone's company? Bakit pag sakin bawal ang maglaro? Bakit sa lalaki pwedi? Is it because I'm a girl? C'mon! Where's the fairness in it?

"If I fall inlove I guess."

"Fall inlove. Ikaw? Hahahaha"

Bigla itong tumawa nang malakas. That's great. Mas mabuting ako ang pag usapan namin kesa maalala niya ang reason kung bakit kami nandito sa bar ngayon. Ngumiti lang ako habang siya tawang tawa. I don't even know what's funny sa sinabi ko. Pero since she's broken now, hayaan mo na. She's faking it. Mula nang dumating kami dito kanina ay hindi nito binabanggit ang ex niya. Which is not okey with me, gusto kong ilabasa niya ang kung ano mang nararamdaman niya. One of the reasons why we're here. Kanina pa namin sinusubukan but she always dodges the question kaya hindi na namin kinulit. If it's her way of forgetting, then will just going to help her. Kahit na ngayong gabi lang. But I know, Kung uuwi yan mamaya at mag isa Naman, iiyak yan.

Her eyes were still swollen. If only I can do something magical, I will surely make her pain vanish. I don't want to see her this vulnerable. Leal is the happy person among the three of us. But now seeing her cry like this, I can't take it.

"Sorry for that Ja, but imagining you being in a serious relationship. I don't know, parang impossible."

"Why? Am I not capable of falling in love?"

Tumigil ito sa pagtawa at sumeryoso bigla. She played the tip of the shot glass.

"To be honest. Sa ating tatlo, ikaw ang pinaka gusto kong makitang ma inlove. I want to see you blush, jealous, absent minded because of a guy. Smile stupidly when he crosses your mind, things like that. I want you to experience it."

Experience it? No need Leal. Those temporary feelings that you want me to experience, comes along with a permanent pain that will surely engrave in my heart. That's why, as long as I can get away from it, I'll be fine. Sunod sunod na tatlong shot ang ginawa ko, halatang nagulat si Leal. I raise my hand lightly to call the attention of the waiter. Agad naman itong lumapit at binigyan kami.