V

Part 3

Harry's name appeared on my phone screen.
"Hey Haz." I greeted.
"Hi, I was thinking maybe we could talk about this in person?" Harry dived straight in.
"Sure. Come over if you want. Mikayla's not home."
"Ok-"
"I didn't mean in that way." I interrupted.
"I'll be there soon. Bye." Harry ignored my awkwardness.
I quickly sent Mikayla a text, trying to shake off the nerves. Despite our awkward exchange, I needed to tell him how I felt. I had to. Mikayla egged me on for the millionth time. I was gonna do it.
Harry's arrival shook me out of my thoughts.
I smiled as I opened the door. We hugged and he followed me inside.
After offering him a drink, we sat down on the sofa.
"So, about last night..." I started.
"Yeah, it happened." Harry replied.
"Yeah, it happened." I echoed.
He suddenly found his glass of water interesting. I ran a hand through my hair in frustration. My declaration of love was definitely not going to happen.
"Stuff like this happens, right? No fault in that." I brushed it off.
Harry gulped. He was still nervous.
"I mean we can still be friends and hook up if we need it?" I continued.
"You mean as in friends.." Harry couldn't finish the sentence.
"With benefits. Yes. Are we good?" I asked, getting up to open a window. I couldn't bear the heat rising in me and I did not want Harry to see me redden.
"Yeah. I am if you are." He shrugged.
"Look, I just want things to be the way they were before last night. No uncomfortable silence or awkwardness. Just friends who have fun every once in a while. We can cut it off whenever we want and just be friends." I smiled, knowing I was digging myself into an even deeper hole.
Harry nodded.
"Oh and one more thing." I added.
"What's that?" Harry asked.
"The boys can't know. Under any circumstance."

"You did WHAT?" Mikayla shouted, throwing a pillow at me.
"Girl, you should have seen him. He was already falling apart and I hadn't even told him that I loved him yet!" I replied.
"Has it ever occurred to you that maybe he wanted to tell you the same thing but didn't know how?" She retorted.
I grimaced. She could be right.
"You lost the perfect chance." She whispered.
"I'll be okay. It's Harry we're talking about." I shrugged.
"I just don't wanna see you get hurt." She replied, reaching out to me, her eyes softening.
"I can't say I won't, but I'll try my best. By the way, all of this is top secret." I reminded.
"Am I supposed to know?"
"It's impossible for you not to." I giggled.

And so a new era of our friendship bloomed. Nobody, except Mikayla, knew about it. But whenever we felt lonely, couldn't sleep or felt the weakness, we called. I was Harry's temporary fix and he was mine. But the more I was with Harry, the more I realized I wouldn't be able to keep up with him. My love for him would catch up.

"Good morning, Y/N." Harry greeted, playing with my hair.
My back was to him so he didn't even realize that I was already awake. Feeling his knuckles brush lightly against my back was killing me, so I turned around to face him.
"Hi." I smiled, stifling a fake yawn.
"Did you sleep well?" He asked, pulling me closer to him.
I nodded, resting my head on his chest.
"There's something I wanted to tell you." Harry sighed.
"I'm all ears." I replied.
"I may have to do some PR stunts here and there. Make appearances with some women." Harry commented.
I nodded.
"I just wanted to know if you're okay with it." He continued.
"Why wouldn't I? We're not a couple." I replied, reminding myself more than him.
"Yeah." He sighed.
"I'm gonna go have a shower." I told him, removing myself from his grasp. No one can tell the difference between tears and water.

"How long are you gonna keep this up?" Mikayla asked, rolling her eyes.
"I can't just tell him I love him. It would make things weird between us." I replied, shaking my head.
"As if they aren't already?" She pointed out.
I shrugged.
"Do things feel like they did before you slept together?" Mikayla asked, putting a hand on my shoulder.
"No. But it's my fault. I keep pushing him away because I don't want to get too comfortable. It'll hurt me even more when a girl comes along to sweep him off his feet." I confessed.
"Are you saying that because of what we're going to be seeing all over social media in the next few days?" Mikayla knew me so well.
"Or about now." I said, pointing to the muted television screen in our living room.
I narrowed my eyes at the screen showing pictures of Harry enjoying himself with Kendall Jenner. I was done. I needed to stop moping. If Harry didn't love me, I would have to come to terms with it. I was going to find someone for myself who I could enjoy every aspect of my life with. But in the meantime, I would fool around with Harry.
"Are you scheming?" Mikayla laughed.
"Nope. I'm getting my shit together." I smiled.
My phone buzzed on the coffee table.
"Did you get the message too?" Mikayla squealed.
"Everyone loves a costume party."