Chapter One: It's a Little Difficult

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~ I decided to write this fanfiction for my best friend, so here it is.

Merry Christmas Love

With that being said, please understand this is my first fanfiction on this app, and I'm not a professional writer.

Please be kind to me, this fanfic, and my hard work.

Enjoy! ~

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It was hard, to say the least. Fighting biology and what you were born to become was not something you were supposed to do, and therefore hard and exhausting.

Felix first handedly knew how true these words were. Fighting your own mind, day after day, hour after hour, minute after minute.

Not that anyone knew of his daily battle. But he preferred it that way.

Felix didn't even want to think of the scolding he would get from Chan, or the amount of motherly-ness he'd get from Minho, or the concern he'd get from the rest of them.

Not that he'd mind these things too much, to be honest.

Despite all these intrusive thoughts about how nice it'd be to tell someone, he refused to let himself dream too much. He'd fought too hard, struggled too much, to just let it all go down the drain.

Even now, he was exhausted from fighting it all day.

It was a normal Wednesday, busy and tiring. Felix wouldn't have it any other way, but that doesn't mean it doesn't get tedious every once in a while.

They have been in the practice room, dancing most of the day.

Tiring, sweaty, and dizzy are three words Felix could use to describe dance practice. Any other words would be along the lines of "adrenaline" "achy muscles" and, of course the ever present "shit I can't feel my legs."

Yeah. A normal Wednesday.

This Wednesday, however, had been particularly hard for Felix.

He'd been having a harder time lately fighting off his little side and pushing it down.

Chan decided that today, this lovely, wonderful, amazing Wednesday that they were gonna review all their dances from the last album "In Life" and spend the entire day dancing to them.

Yay.

Any other Wednesday, Felix wouldn't have minded so much. This particular Wednesday, he was on the verge of slipping, and rehearsing the dance for Easy was proving to be his downfall.

Part of the dance required Chan and Jisung to pick Felix up and rock him in between them, with him sitting on their arms.

If Felix had a better mental control, like usual, it wouldn't affect him this badly. However, as Chan and Jisung hoisted him up into their arms, Felix could feel himself start to slip.

Not physically, but it sure had that effect as he tried to yank himself out of headspace.

He fell off of Chan's and Jisung's arms, luckily catching himself before he face-planted onto the hard floor, but still landing hard on his wrist with a twist.

The members rushed to him, the music stopping in the middle of Felix's recorded verse.

"Felix!! Felix are you ok? I'm sorry, I should've caught you!" Chan was trying to apologize to Felix and ask him something at the same time.

"I-I'm fine, Chan. Seriously, stop fussing over me, I'm fine." Felix protested Chan's concern, concerned himself about his oncoming headspace.

Pain made a Littles headspace, no matter what age, more acute and more likely to slip. Felix was no exception.

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